The Colbert Report

Intro - 7/26/07

Season 3 • 07/26/2007

North Dakota seeks to legalize hemp farming. Corn won't be the only thing high as an elephant's eye.

More

Watching

00:32

Intro - 7/25/07
The Colbert ReportS3

Scientists develop a removable tattoo, Fred Thompson demotes his campaign manager, and Stephen asks Charles Kaiser if there's a gay Superman.
07/25/2007
03:40

The Word - No Regrets
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen believes that you should never regret a decision but instead get it tattooed on your forehead.
07/25/2007
01:33

Thompson Campaign
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen believes America deserves a president who is ready to roll up his sleeves and get to work on a 52-ounce porterhouse.
07/25/2007
02:46

Hometown Hero Town - Bryce Canyon City
The Colbert ReportS3

In order to establish Colbert Report City, the show will now be taped in Utah. Go Jazz!
07/25/2007
06:00

Daily Kos
The Colbert ReportS3

Hey New York Times -- Stephen didn't spoil Harry Potter for you, don't ruin the war in Iraq for him.
07/25/2007
05:21

Charles Kaiser
The Colbert ReportS3

When Charles Kaiser suggests that New York is a gay metropolis because of critical mass, Stephen understands that to mean it's like a dangerous nuclear bomb.
07/25/2007
06:32

Bob Shrum
The Colbert ReportS3

Democratic campaign strategist Bob Shrum wants to know if Stephen's wrist injury has made him reconsider his position on universal health care.
07/26/2007
06:04

Industrial Hemp & Medical Marijuana - Aaron Houston
The Colbert ReportS3

Medical marijuana advocate Aaron Houston tells Stephen the only thing you'd get from smoking hemp is the headache of your life.
07/26/2007
03:22

Advice to the Gods - Nepalese Pre-Teen Goddesses
The Colbert ReportS3

A top Kumari -- a pre-teen girl Nepalese Buddhists worship as a goddess -- was recently stripped of her divinity for visiting the United States.
07/26/2007
03:35

How Did Stephen Break His Wrist?
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen's left wrist is in a cast, though there's some confusion about what might have caused the injury.
07/26/2007
00:32

Intro - 7/26/07
The Colbert ReportS3

North Dakota seeks to legalize hemp farming, a goddess is stripped of her title, and Stephen asks Robert Shrum whether he advised Kerry to flip or to flop.
07/26/2007
02:51

Wrist Violence - Glorification
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen dispels the rumor that he injured his wrist while punching out Korean strongman Kim Jong-il.
07/30/2007
05:29

Evan Osnos
The Colbert ReportS3

Chicago Tribune's Beijing Bureau Chief, Evan Osnos, argues that the American demand for cashmere has caused pollution clouds to travel from China to American soil.
07/30/2007
05:24

ThreatDown - Scottish Surgeons
The Colbert ReportS3

Thanks to Scottish surgeons, the only way America can protect its ports is by crossbreeding dolphins with Homeland Security director Michael Chertoff.
07/30/2007
02:48

The Word - Solidarity
The Colbert ReportS3

By hiring the homeless to picket for them, carpenters are protesting low wages and no benefits with low wages and no benefits.
07/30/2007
02:55

Pollution Immigration
The Colbert ReportS3

Polluted air from Asia, or "kung fumes," are taking away emphysema-related deaths from hardworking American pollutants.
07/30/2007
00:27

Intro - 7/30/07
The Colbert ReportS3

In this episode, Stephen suggests a new picketing strategy for unions, looks at botulism in our chili and interviews Chicago Tribune's Beijing Bureau Chief, Evan Osnos.
07/30/2007
02:24

The Word - Special Prosecutor
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen argues that if Alberto Gonzales believes what he is saying, then technically, it's not perjury.
07/31/2007
04:54

Sport Report - Barry Bonds
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen defends Barry Bonds' alleged drug use, gambles his money away in the Saudi Arabia and Iraq soccer game and talks about a racing greyhound that's named after him.
07/31/2007
00:38

Rupert Murdoch Purchases The Wall Street Journal
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen wonders if Rupert Murdoch has instead taken over Reuters, who were first to report the story.
07/31/2007
02:21

Wrist Violence Epidemic
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen continues to attack films that show wrist violence and calls on Hollywood to stop showing such acts.
07/31/2007
You may also like5 Videos
Trailer
01:49

"South Park: Snow Day!" Trailer
South Park

Join your favorite South Park characters as they fight for neighborhood dominance during a blizzard in "South Park: Snow Day!," available now.
03/26/2024
Trailer
00:28

Make the Most of a Day Off with "South Park: Snow Day!"
South ParkS26

Join Cartman and the neighborhood kids as they battle Stan, who has his own ideas about the rules of their fantasy game, in the "South Park: Snow Day!" video game, now available to preorder.
12/21/2023
Trailer
01:00

"Star Trek: very Short Treks" Has Lightyears of Laughs
Star Trek: very Short TreksS1

Relive the classic vibe of "Star Trek: The Animated Series," and join Riker, Spock and more Starfleet faces on the bite-sized journeys of "Star Trek: very Short Treks," now streaming.
11/22/2023
Trailer
01:00

Fires and Full Moons Breed a New Terror on Wolf Pack

A California wildfire awakens a werewolf, but a group of curious teens -- once bitten -- will not shy away from the threat of decimation on Wolf Pack, streaming January 26 on Paramount+.
10/12/2022
Trailer
01:41

This Game of M.A.S.H. Is a Real Monster in Cursed Friends
Cursed Friends

Four pals must break an evil spell and change their fates when a classic kid's game to predict the future comes back to haunt them in the Comedy Central original movie Cursed Friends.
10/10/2022