You're Not My Penis
South Park
Season 12 E 5 • 04/09/2008

Garrison's penis rampages all over South Park, terrifying the local women.

Watching

01:13

We All Get Exposed
South ParkS20 E6

Garrison makes one final appeal to the nation and urges them to vote against him on November 8.
10/26/2016
01:41

That's When You Get Member Berries
South ParkS20 E5

Randy tries to explain why the country is voting for a Giant Douche.
10/19/2016
01:53

My Opponent IS a LIAR and Cannot Be Trusted
South ParkS20 E3

At the first Presidential debate, Garrison speaks from the heart and tries to convince everyone to vote for his opponent.
09/28/2016
00:48

Canadian ABCs
South ParkS19 E2

Mr. Garrison is forced to take a Canadian Language night class.
09/23/2015
01:50

Your Hero, Caitlyn Jenner
South ParkS19 E2

After getting an award from President Obama for his speech about tolerance, Kyle finally meets his hero. Meanwhile, Garrison complains about the recent influx of illegal immigrants.
09/23/2015
02:13

You're Not A Hobbit, Right?
South ParkS17 E10

Kanye tries to convince the class that his fiance is not a hobbit.
12/11/2013
01:16

HERE WE GO AGAIN!
South ParkS17 E3

Cartman continues to have nightmares in class, leading to another talk with Mr. Mackey and Tolkien.
10/09/2013
01:12

I'll Be M'kay
South ParkS17 E3

Nightmares in class cause Cartman to have a sit down with Mr. Mackey.
10/09/2013
01:03

Class 5 Hoarder
South ParkS14 E10

The hoarding specialists discuss how to tackle Stan and Mackey's illness.
10/20/2010
00:50

We're On Our Own
South ParkS14 E9

When Japan refuses to help, Randy suggests drastic measures.
10/13/2010
01:23

NO Jersey
South ParkS14 E9

The citizens of South Park make a final stand against New Jersey.
10/13/2010
01:23

The Jersey Problem
South ParkS14 E9

The town discusses the impending Jersey threat and Sheila comes forward with a confession.
10/13/2010
02:20

Profile Stan Marsh
South ParkS14 E4

Stan's profile holds a huge chat party.
04/07/2010
02:39

Nice Lady with the Handkerchief Test
South ParkS14 E1

The 4th graders all get tested for sexual addiction.
03/17/2010
00:52

They Took 'er Economy
South ParkS13 E3

The people of South Park talk about the dark economic times.
03/25/2009
01:57

I Just Love Happy Endings
South ParkS12 E12

Obama decides to hang it up, and give this President thing a try.
11/05/2008
01:11

No Room In The Ark
South ParkS12 E12

McCain supporters seek refuge in Mr. Stotch's bunker.
11/05/2008
01:19

Game Over Man, Mkay
South ParkS12 E12

While Obama fans celebrate change, McCain supporters mope in disappointment.
11/05/2008
01:28

Almost Time
South ParkS12 E9

With only minutes left in the school day, Cartman needs a way out.
10/15/2008
01:10

Wendy To the Principal's Office, Please
South ParkS12 E9

Cartman gives his own report on breast cancer awareness.
10/15/2008
00:46

Bad Historical Acting
South ParkS12 E7

Murderin' Murphy is released from the Pioneer Village jailhouse.
04/23/2008
01:39

The Burger King Bandits
South ParkS12 E7

The police surround Pioneer Village and the Bandits are forced to take the fourth grade class hostage.
04/23/2008
00:21

Boys, Have You Seen My Penis
South ParkS12 E5

Garrison is looking everywhere for his escaped penis.
04/09/2008
01:00

You're Not My Penis
South ParkS12 E5

Garrison's penis rampages all over South Park, terrifying the local women.
04/09/2008
02:48

Tourette's Children
South ParkS11 E8

Mr. Donaldson comes to school to promote Tourette's understanding. Kyle has to meet some children with Tourette's, where he learns how sad it really is.
10/03/2007
01:45

Coffee and Secrets
South ParkS11 E6

Garrison makes coffee as the Mexican spies return with Xerxes' secret. Xerxes demands to speak with Garrison alone.
04/11/2007
00:51

Rauf Xerxes
South ParkS11 E6

The Persian boss, Rauf Xerxes, shows up and decides that he will deal with the lesbians himself.
04/11/2007
01:48

The Battle
South ParkS11 E6

The Persians show up to redecorate the bar, a battle ensues when the lesbians refuse to let them in.
04/11/2007
01:05

Weekend Homework
South ParkS11 E6

Garrison takes her frustration with men out on the class by assigning an essay on "The Old Man and the Sea."
04/11/2007
02:37

Take a Stand
South ParkS11 E6

The Persians try to make peace with the Les Bos regulars. Garrison doesn't accept and decides it's time to take a stand.
04/11/2007
02:02

Scissor Me Timbers
South ParkS11 E6

After going to Les Bos with her new friend Allison, Garrison learns the finer points of scissoring.
04/11/2007
01:57

School Evacuated
South ParkS11 E4

The school is evacuated and Cartman tries to get in contact with the president.
03/28/2007
00:48

A Sock and a Bar of Soap
South ParkS11 E3

Cartman shows up at Clyde's door armed with a sock and a bar of soap. Kenny's been found out, and it's time for him to pay.
03/21/2007
01:06

Cartman Shows Picture
South ParkS11 E2

Cartman shows the incriminating picture to the entire class, just before getting a message from his mom saying she found the original.
03/14/2007
01:00

Show and Tell
South ParkS11 E2

Cartman starts show and tell with a few of his favorite artsy photographs.
03/14/2007
01:30

Atheists Plan To Go To War
South ParkS10 E13

Three warring factions of atheists plot against one another based on science, Richard Dawkins and Garrison.
11/08/2006
02:27

Sex Change Operation?
South ParkS10 E13

Cartman tells Richard Dawkins' about Garrison's sex change, thus restoring order to the future.
11/08/2006
01:33

Sweet Monkey Love
South ParkS10 E12

Mrs. Garrison goes on a date with Richard Dawkins. He teaches her about atheists, evolution, and eventually, hot monkey sex.
11/01/2006
00:54

Mr. Venezuela
South ParkS10 E9

A possible urinal culprit has been caught.
10/11/2006
01:14

Dookie in the Urinal
South ParkS10 E9

Somebody went #2 in the urinal and Mr. Mackey wants answers.
10/11/2006
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