The Colbert Report

Onward Christian Soldiers

Season 6 • 01/19/2010

U.S. soldiers use "Jesus rifles" inscribed with secret New Testament verses.

More

Watching

02:28

Massachusetts Special Election
The Colbert ReportS6

The Massachusetts Senate race is the kind of national election Stephen loves -- the type that gets decided by one state.
01/18/2010
05:35

Emily Pilloton
The Colbert ReportS6

Emily Pilloton wants to create things that aren't just well designed, but have a positive social impact.
01/18/2010
00:28

Intro - 1/18/10
The Colbert ReportS6

Stephen wants to dig for coal, and Emily Pilloton helps the world's needy with industrial design.
01/18/2010
06:41

Coal Comfort - Margaret Palmer
The Colbert ReportS6

Margaret Palmer believes there's a better way to mine for coal than blowing the tops off mountains.
01/18/2010
00:16

Sign Off - Home Barbershop Quartet Game
The Colbert ReportS6

Stephen sings goodnight for all of you playing along with the home barbershop quartet game.
01/18/2010
03:46

Own a Piece of Histor-Me - Original Interview Table
The Colbert ReportS6

Jack up the price of Stephen's original interview table since all proceeds will go to Haiti Disaster Relief.
01/18/2010
00:32

Intro - 1/19/10
The Colbert ReportS6

Stephen needs a clean pint of urine before he can make an Olympic team, and Stephen Bosworth discusses North Korea.
01/19/2010
06:38

Skate Expectations - Speedskating Team Training - Tucker Fredricks
The Colbert ReportS6

Stephen will crush Shani Davis in a speedskating race, but first Tucker Fredricks needs to teach him how to skate.
01/19/2010
04:58

Skate Expectations - Speedskating Team Training
The Colbert ReportS6

Now that Stephen has saved speedskating by raising $300,000, he's sure to make the Olympic team.
01/19/2010
00:10

Sign Off - Teleprompter in Italics
The Colbert ReportS6

Stephen leans sideways to read the teleprompter in italics.
01/19/2010
02:37

Onward Christian Soldiers
The Colbert ReportS6

Technically, "Jesus rifles" aren't a holy war -- they're more like an armor-piercing Sunday school.
01/19/2010
06:27

Skate Expectations - Speedskating Team Training - Colbert vs. Davis
The Colbert ReportS6

Stephen faces off against Shani Davis to win the last place on the U.S. Speedskating team.
01/20/2010
00:37

Intro - 1/20/10
The Colbert ReportS6

Stephen races Shani Davis and tells the touching human story of how he overcame adversity to interview Dick Ebersol.
01/20/2010
02:48

Skate Expectations - Speedskating Race
The Colbert ReportS6

Stephen calls on the Colbert Nation to raise $200 million for NBC and prepares to race Shani Davis.
01/20/2010
06:44

Dick Ebersol
The Colbert ReportS6

Dick Ebersol invites Stephen to cover the Olympics as a member of the NBC team and receives a check from the Colbert Nation.
01/20/2010
03:06

Boston Dream Guy
The Colbert ReportS6

Stephen owes Massachusetts an apology after voters elect Scott Brown to the Senate.
01/20/2010
00:19

Sign Off - Raise Money for Haiti Relief
The Colbert ReportS6

Don't forget to bid on Stephen's desk and watch Jon Stewart on "Hope for Haiti" tomorrow night.
01/21/2010
06:08

John Farmer
The Colbert ReportS6

John Farmer reveals that the government misrepresented the responsiveness of the national command structure on 9/11.
01/21/2010
04:22

ThreatDown - Airport Security Edition
The Colbert ReportS6

A senior citizen tries to board a plane with a sword hidden inside his cane, and an eight-year-old boy is on the TSA watch list.
01/21/2010
00:32

Intro - 1/21/10
The Colbert ReportS6

Stephen reviews Obama's first year in office, examines airport terrorism and discusses national security with John Farmer.
01/21/2010
01:00

Own a Piece of Histor-Me - Legendary Interview Table
The Colbert ReportS6

Own the legendary interview table where Stephen was baptized by Richard Branson and tongued by Jane Fonda.
01/21/2010
You may also like5 Videos
Trailer
00:30

XXXI Days of Announcing the Holidays

Andrew Catalon of CBS Sports rings in the holiday season with expert commentary on the festive shows, movies and specials airing all December long!
12/01/2023
Trailer
01:43

"South Park: Snow Day!" Video Game Showcases New Gameplay
South Park

"South Park: Snow Day!" immerses players in a new art style, bringing your favorite characters to life while exploring classic locations from the show, now available to preorder in-store.
12/01/2023
Trailer
01:00

"Star Trek: very Short Treks" Has Lightyears of Laughs
Star Trek: very Short TreksS1

Relive the classic vibe of "Star Trek: The Animated Series," and join Riker, Spock and more Starfleet faces on the bite-sized journeys of "Star Trek: very Short Treks," now streaming.
11/22/2023
Trailer
01:00

Fires and Full Moons Breed a New Terror on Wolf Pack

A California wildfire awakens a werewolf, but a group of curious teens -- once bitten -- will not shy away from the threat of decimation on Wolf Pack, streaming January 26 on Paramount+.
10/12/2022
Trailer
01:41

This Game of M.A.S.H. Is a Real Monster in Cursed Friends
Cursed Friends

Four pals must break an evil spell and change their fates when a classic kid's game to predict the future comes back to haunt them in the Comedy Central original movie Cursed Friends.
10/10/2022