The Daily Show with Jon Stewart

The Colbert Report

Season 8 • 10/22/2003

It doesn't matter what you think, you're wrong.

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02:01

Just About the Hunger
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

David Blaine's stunts are a metaphor, as in today's troubled times, there are no escapes.
10/21/2003
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00:10

Moment of Zen - Macaroni Penguin Reading
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

Laura Bush sees a sea lion splashing at her.
10/21/2003
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02:13

Headlines - Blade Runner
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

A 20-year-old kid emails the FBI to tell them he is going to sneak box cutters onto a plane and it takes the FBI five weeks to respond.
10/22/2003
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03:06

Where's My Jane Goodall?
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

Welcome to the real world -- they show you the grape and then stick you with the cucumber.
10/22/2003
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00:18

Moment of Zen - Monkeys and Moonshine
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

A monkey drinks moonshine to sad music.
10/22/2003
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02:49

The Kobe Trial
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

Outside of the Kobe Bryant trial, a media circus has already pitched its tent even though the trial has yet to begin.
10/22/2003
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00:29

Van Buren Anecdotes
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

Jon speculates on what college kids may have just gotten out of the Walter Isaacson interview.
10/22/2003
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07:08

Walter Isaacson
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

Walter Isaacson talks about the Founding Fathers and how easy it was to invent something in the 18th century.
10/22/2003
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01:37

Liza Beat Me
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

There is no conceivable amount of money in the world that could possibly be worth telling the world you were beaten up by Liza Minnelli.
10/22/2003
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00:59

Headlines - Witless For The Defense
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

John Allen Muhammad attempted to defend himself and then changed his mind.
10/22/2003
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01:00

The Colbert Report
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

Stephen Colbert's latest, just canceled project, The Colbert Report, almost was an in your face news show.
10/22/2003
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04:57

Anthony Hopkins
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

Anthony Hopkins' wife thinks he should believe more in himself.
10/23/2003
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00:35

Moment of Zen - Floats
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

A float of Australian Prime Minister John Howard kisses the butt of a George W. Bush float.
10/23/2003
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01:28

Defensive Secretary
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

Donald Rumsfeld forgets that he wrote a harsh report of America's anti-terrorism policy.
10/23/2003
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04:58

The President in Asia - Lost In Translation
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

George W. Bush deals with a heckler in the Australian Parliament by not giving him pie.
10/23/2003
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03:07

No Hard Ceilings
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

It is suspicious that in a country of 25 million living people, the news would focus on 10 dead from a car bomb.
10/23/2003
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03:35

All-Star Salute to Getting Hit in the Nuts
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

When the brain sees someone else get hit in the nuts, it activates the hitnutculus, which advertisers know is connected to the consumptus majorus or the buying center.
10/23/2003
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02:18

Mess O'Potamia - Iraqi War Irony 2712
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

This is absolutely the last time Paul Wolfowitz will stay at the Al Rasheed Hotel.
10/27/2003
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01:42

Supermarket Sweep
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

The INS cracks down on illegal immigrants working at Wal-Mart but lets them mop up one last time.
10/27/2003
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00:39

Intro - Omaha, Nebraska
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

Omaha is in Nebraska, not Canada.
10/27/2003
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06:07

Ted Danson
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS8

Ted Danson's post-"Becker" career will not include dinner theater.
10/27/2003
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