The Colbert Report

President Obama's First Physical

Season 6 • 03/02/2010

President Obama's crippling alcoholism is just the tip of the bourbon-soaked ice cube.

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02:35

President Obama Mentions Stephen
The Colbert ReportS6

If President Obama keeps mentioning Stephen, he'll soon be upgraded to a Selleck mustache.
03/01/2010
01:07

Intro - Stephen Wins the Olympics
The Colbert ReportS6

Stephen needs a score of 74.52 in order to beat Bob Costas and win the Vancouver Olympics.
03/01/2010
06:09

Don Cheadle
The Colbert ReportS6

If Don Cheadle really cared about drawing attention to his causes, he'd do heroin for Darfur.
03/01/2010
07:00

Olympics Wrap-Up - Michael Buble
The Colbert ReportS6

Stephen checks in with his Quebecois colleague, Stephane Colbert, and sings both national anthems with Michael Buble.
03/01/2010
03:09

Health Care Marriage Counseling
The Colbert ReportS6

Republicans and Democrats are like a husband and wife fighting over whether to have a health care bill baby.
03/01/2010
04:52

The Word - Kid-Owe
The Colbert ReportS6

A new credit website teaches kids how to spend money they don't have on things that don't exist.
03/02/2010
04:37

Colbert Platinum - Necker Nymph & Lexus LFA
The Colbert ReportS6

Richard Branson introduces a private deep-sea craft, and Toyota manufactures a Lexus that will accelerate for you.
03/02/2010
00:28

Intro - 3/2/10
The Colbert ReportS6

Stephen questions whether kids are too small to fail and asks David Brooks what it's like to be in two dying industries at once.
03/02/2010
00:13

Sign Off - Goose That Lays the Golden Egg
The Colbert ReportS6

Don't kill the goose that lays the golden egg -- force-feed him grain and get some golden foie gras.
03/02/2010
07:06

David Brooks
The Colbert ReportS6

David Brooks compares the Tea Partiers to Wal-Mart hippies and calls Obama a thoughtful guy with a spending problem.
03/02/2010
02:23

President Obama's First Physical
The Colbert ReportS6

The results of President Obama's first physical reveal that he is an obese alcoholic with rabies.
03/02/2010
02:26

Jim Bunning Ends Filibuster
The Colbert ReportS6

It's hard to be universally reviled as a half-witted, egomaniacal sociopath, but doing the right thing is never easy.
03/03/2010
06:34

Garry Wills
The Colbert ReportS6

Garry Wills fears that the president's power to declare war puts the Constitution in danger.
03/03/2010
03:36

Tip/Wag - American Academy of Pediatrics & Starbucks
The Colbert ReportS6

The American Academy of Pediatrics calls for a hot dog redesign, and Starbucks introduces a new 31-ounce size.
03/03/2010
00:03

Sign Off - Goodnight
The Colbert ReportS6

That's it for The Report, everybody.
03/03/2010
06:59

Greece's Economic Downfall - Scheherazade Rehman
The Colbert ReportS6

Scheherazade Rehman discusses the likelihood of Greece receiving a bailout from the European Union.
03/03/2010
07:00

Barry Schwartz
The Colbert ReportS6

Barry Schwartz explains why people are paralyzed with indecision when they're offered too many choices.
03/04/2010
00:15

Sign Off - See You Later, Alligator
The Colbert ReportS6

The studio has a severe alligator problem -- as soon as the cameras go off, run.
03/04/2010
04:32

Tip/Wag - James O'Keefe & Sean Hannity
The Colbert ReportS6

Sean Hannity joins Stephen for a heavily edited interview to talk about James O'Keefe's deceptive ACORN videos.
03/04/2010
04:18

Health Care Magic
The Colbert ReportS6

Stephen performs magic tricks to show how the Democrats are trying to pass health care reform.
03/04/2010
03:37

Iraqracy
The Colbert ReportS6

Iraqi elections let the free market decide the best man for the job -- that's usually the guy giving away free meat.
03/04/2010
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