The Colbert Report

Stephen Confesses to a Distracted Media

Season 7 • 05/05/2011

Stephen steals Clif Bars from Whole Foods and admits he's a meth-addicted tweaker freak.

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03:45

Terrorists: They're Just Like Us!
The Colbert ReportS7

Reporters reveal all the juicy gossip about Osama bin Laden's lifestyle of glam on the lam.
05/04/2011
06:01

Movies That Are Destroying America - Saving America Edition
The Colbert ReportS7

"Captain America" delivers an all-American message about steroids, and liberal Hollywood conspires to destroy "Atlas Shrugged."
05/04/2011
04:05

Stephen Searches for Shared Bathroom Key
The Colbert ReportS7

Stephen urges viewers to donate to the Red Cross while he searches for the shared bathroom key under David Letterman's desk.
05/04/2011
00:07

Sign Off - Goodnight
The Colbert ReportS7

That's it for The Report.
05/04/2011
00:36

Intro - 5/4/11
The Colbert ReportS7

Details emerge about Bin Laden's safe house, "Atlas Shrugged" comes to the big screen, and Amy Farrell wants to end the persecution of fat people.
05/04/2011
05:58

Amy Farrell
The Colbert ReportS7

Amy Farrell says America's diet industry reinforces the culture of fat shame.
05/04/2011
00:08

Sign Off - Dennis Kucinich Heat Vision
The Colbert ReportS7

Stephen examines the holes left from Dennis Kucinich's heat vision.
05/05/2011
03:29

Inaugural Republican Presidential Debate & Donald Trump's Wisdom
The Colbert ReportS7

Several potential Republican candidates pass on the inaugural presidential debate, and Donald Trump compares same-sex marriage to long golf clubs.
05/05/2011
05:31

ThreatDown - Superman, Madden NFL 12 & "Glee"
The Colbert ReportS7

Superman renounces his U.S. citizenship, Madden NFL 12 adds a concussion rule, and "Glee" glamorizes homosexuality.
05/05/2011
06:09

Bill James
The Colbert ReportS7

Bill James discusses Lizzie Borden's innocence, Winnie Judd's murderous phase and John Wayne Gacy's valuable paintings.
05/05/2011
04:54

Stephen Confesses to a Distracted Media
The Colbert ReportS7

Stephen admits to petty theft, an art heist and a debilitating meth habit while the news media is distracted with Bin Laden's death.
05/05/2011
00:07

Sign Off - Lupe Fiasco's "Lasers"
The Colbert ReportS7

Stephen signs off with Lupe Fiasco's album, "Lasers."
05/09/2011
01:08

Herman Cain Wins the First Republican Presidential Debate
The Colbert ReportS7

People say Herman Cain is the Republicans' dark horse candidate, but Stephen doesn't see horse color.
05/09/2011
00:26

Intro - 5/9/11
The Colbert ReportS7

Mountain Dew Presents Michigan finds a unique solution to the debt crisis, and Lupe Fiasco performs.
05/09/2011
04:47

Lupe Fiasco
The Colbert ReportS7

Lupe Fiasco wears his smart glasses to speak out against Obama, the war on terror and segregation in Chicago.
05/09/2011
03:19

Hasidic Newspaper Removes Hillary Clinton
The Colbert ReportS7

Brooklyn's Hasidic newspaper removes Hillary Clinton from a photo because there's nothing more sexually suggestive than a woman killing a terrorist.
05/09/2011
06:02

The Word - Autocratic for the People
The Colbert ReportS7

Michigan's emergency financial manager strips elected officials of power so they don't oppose his ideas to save money.
05/09/2011
05:05

Difference Makers - Donald Trump
The Colbert ReportS7

Donald Trump is a reclusive patriot who has the courage and generosity to erect a huge flagpole on his golf course.
05/10/2011
00:18

Sign Off - A Rare Correction
The Colbert ReportS7

Geoffrey Rush has only won one Academy Award, so he's not that good of an actor.
05/10/2011
07:10

Yahweh or No Way - Thor & Apocalypse Billboard
The Colbert ReportS7

"Thor" earns $66 million in its opening weekend, and a Family Radio billboard predicts the end of the world.
05/10/2011
03:10

Newt Gingrich & Donald Trump Announce Future Announcements
The Colbert ReportS7

Newt Gingrich finally announces that he will be making an announcement, and Donald Trump decides to run in his mind.
05/10/2011
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