The Colbert Report

The Word - Unhealthy Competition

Season 4 • 06/03/2008

It's like LendingTree: when terrorists compete, we win.

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05:22

Jon Paskowitz
The Colbert ReportS4

Jon Paskowitz tells Stephen what it was like to travel around with a large family and a father who decided his children were going to surf instead of go to school.
06/02/2008
04:13

The Word - Media Culpa
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Media, if you want to prove you did your job well in the lead-up to the Iraq war, use the same techniques that McClellan used to sell the war to you in the first place.
06/02/2008
00:33

Intro - 6/2/08
The Colbert ReportS4

Scott McClellan says the press didn't do its job in the run-up to the war. Why is he complaining? They did his job.
06/02/2008
00:49

Obama's Church
The Colbert ReportS4

Unfortunately, America can't vote for a man who doesn't even belong to a church. So Hillary it is.
06/02/2008
04:56

Colbert Platinum - Private Jets
The Colbert ReportS4

Platinum members can now get servants' quarters on their private jets, a $175 hamburger, and Stephen's own iPod Nano postage stamp.
06/02/2008
01:53

Fire at Universal
The Colbert ReportS4

God must have been listening to Stephen's prayers because Universal Studios went up in flames.
06/02/2008
07:15

George Will
The Colbert ReportS4

George Will explains conservatives understand that the government's job is to deliver the mail, defend the shores, and get out of the way.
06/03/2008
04:04

Stephen's Sound Advice - Summer Jobs
The Colbert ReportS4

Interns learn valuable job skills like getting coffee, fetching copy paper, and moisturizing a TV host.
06/03/2008
02:48

Democratic Primaries Over
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen goes through the stages of grief now that the Democratic primaries are over.
06/03/2008
00:28

Intro - 6/3/08
The Colbert ReportS4

Is Al Qaeda running out of steam? And if so, what's powering Bin Laden's dialysis machine?
06/03/2008
05:00

The Word - Unhealthy Competition
The Colbert ReportS4

The great thing about the war on terror is that if we fight it right, it can go on forever.
06/03/2008
07:46

Libertarian Party - Bob Barr
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen asks Libertarian presidential candidate Bob Barr if he's afraid the government will make him register his moustache.
06/04/2008
01:46

The Lost O'Reilly Tapes Pt. 2
The Colbert ReportS4

On January 18, 2007, William Jefferson O'Reilly was interviewed for seven minutes, but only five of those minutes made it to air.
06/04/2008
05:44

Salman Rushdie
The Colbert ReportS4

Salman Rushdie tells Stephen why playing Helen Hunt's gynecologist appealed to him.
06/04/2008
03:48

John McCain's Green Screen Challenge
The Colbert ReportS4

By speaking in front of a green screen, John McCain issues a bold challenge to Americans to make him seem interesting.
06/04/2008
00:33

Intro - 6/4/08
The Colbert ReportS4

The Democratic primaries are over. Are we positive Canada doesn't get a caucus?
06/04/2008
00:31

Intro - 6/5/08
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen gives advice to college graduates, or at least that's his excuse for showing up at frat parties.
06/05/2008
04:20

The Word - Oh, The Places You'll Stay
The Colbert ReportS4

Sure, Gandhi said, ''You must be the change that you want to see in the world," but he also drank his own urine.
06/05/2008
01:38

The Andromeda Strain
The Colbert ReportS4

Even during a fictional disaster threatening all of humanity, Stephen is number one!
06/05/2008
06:21

Pat Buchanan
The Colbert ReportS4

Pat Buchanan believes World War II was the easiest war to avoid in all of history.
06/05/2008
06:31

Sport Report - Mike Forrester
The Colbert ReportS4

Mike Forrester is the man who will bring the Timbersports trophy back to the country that invented recreational deforestation.
06/05/2008
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