The Colbert Report
America's Bucket List
Season 7 • 07/26/2011
America has a week to finish off its bucket list before defaulting on its loans and facing collapse.
Vaginal Puppeteering vs. D**k ScrubThe Colbert ReportS7
Summer's Eve's ad campaign features talking vaginas, but Stephen wants to target men's deeply troubling genitals for a change.
Y2-GayThe Colbert ReportS7
New York's first gay newlyweds, 85-year-old Connie Kopelov and 77-year-old Phyllis Siegel, seal their vows with a kiss on the cheek -- or as they call it, "scissoring."
Norwegian Muslish Gunman's Islam-Esque AtrocityThe Colbert ReportS7
Just because Norway's confessed murderer is a blond, blue-eyed, Norwegian-born, anti-Muslim crusader doesn't mean he's not a swarthy, ululating madman.
Sign Off - The ThinkerThe Colbert ReportS7
Stephen interrupts his deep thoughts to say goodnight.
"Poor" in AmericaThe Colbert ReportS7
A Heritage Foundation report proves that as long as "poor" Americans have refrigerators and the strength to brush flies off their eyeballs, they're not really poor.
Herman Cain Cancels on StephenThe Colbert ReportS7
Herman Cain treats Stephen like some pizza crust he can just leave on his plate before moving on to a hotter slice.
Sign Off - America's Bucket ListThe Colbert ReportS7
Stephen says goodnight while checking off items from America's bucket list.
"Poor" in America - Peter EdelmanThe Colbert ReportS7
Peter Edelman explains why America can't call the troops home and beat its plowshares back into swords when it comes to fighting the war on poverty.
Intro - 7/26/11The Colbert ReportS7
Americans might soon find out what it means to be poor, Democrats will either cave or crumble over the debt ceiling, and radio host Brooke Gladstone has a graphic novel.
Brooke GladstoneThe Colbert ReportS7
NPR host Brooke Gladstone explains why her graphic novel is similar to radio and fights the popular notion that the media control minds.
America's Bucket ListThe Colbert ReportS7
Before American society collapses into roving, cannibalistic motorcycle gangs, it should try bubble tea and have sex with Canada.
Nissan's "LEAF Wave" DeadlineThe Colbert ReportS7
Grassroots-organic-slow-food-locavore types who buy electric cars love manufactured traditions.
Sign Off - Surveillance Drone CrashThe Colbert ReportS7
Stephen operates and crashes a semi-autonomous flying surveillance drone.
Difference Makers - Patrick RodgersThe Colbert ReportS7
For too long, average homeowners have been powerless against big banks, but vampire Patrick Rodgers forecloses on the foreclosers.
Missy CummingsThe Colbert ReportS7
Missy Cummings wants to replace the military's cumbersome battlefield surveillance technology with lightweight, smartphone-operated drones.
Helium Runs OutThe Colbert ReportS7
With America's helium supply dwindling, the country has no choice but to hunt balloons in the wild.
Buddy Roemer Pt. 1The Colbert ReportS7
Republican presidential candidate Buddy Roemer takes no PAC money and wants to kick the special-interest hogs off the trough.
Colbert Super PAC - For the ChildrenThe Colbert ReportS7
Little Charlie and Grace's mom won't let them have a Colbert Super PAC lemonade stand until Stephen can tell them what his Super PAC stands for.
Sign Off - Cone of SilenceThe Colbert ReportS7
Stephen says goodnight with the Colbert Super PAC Cone of Silence over his head.
Buddy Roemer Pt. 2The Colbert ReportS7
Republican presidential candidate Buddy Roemer needs financial help from Iowans, but Trevor Potter has warned him not to discuss his campaign plans with Stephen.
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