The Colbert Report
Stephen Gives Up Catholicism for Lent
Season 7 • 03/09/2011
There's nothing to keep Stephen from masturbating after he gives up Catholicism for Lent.
The Colbert ReportS7 Sign Off - Welcome Zoe Simone Sanchez
Stephen is sure Zoe Simone Sanchez is wearing a limited edition Vera Wang onesie.
The Colbert ReportS7 Dan Sinker
Dan Sinker questions the sanity of anyone who actually thought he was Rahm Emanuel on Twitter.
The Colbert ReportS7 Happy Mardi Gras & International Women's Day
Stephen celebrates women's regrettable self-exposure and their achievements on Mardi Gras Day.
The Colbert ReportS7 Charlie Sheen & Fake Rahm Emanuel on Twitter
Charlie Sheen gets a new gig as Twitter overlord, and the fake Rahm Emanuel is unmasked.
The Colbert ReportS7 Light Bulb Ban
The socket huggers claim that pigtail bulbs last up to 10 years, but they haven't considered how the efficient lights will affect the joke-telling industry.
The Colbert ReportS7 Bench Press - Anthony Weiner
Anthony Weiner wants to ensure that the Supreme Court upholds a standard of ethics by asking Clarence Thomas to recuse himself from health care cases.
The Colbert ReportS7 Intro - 3/9/11
Clarence Thomas may have a conflict of interest, and Stephen hopes David Brooks' book, "The Social Animal," is about a hamster on Facebook.
The Colbert ReportS7 David Brooks
David Brooks describes the way unconscious emotions affect people's decisions and values.
The Colbert ReportS7 Bench Press
If every Supreme Court justice had to recuse themselves over a conflict of interest, we would never see John Roberts' NASCAR robe.
The Colbert ReportS7 Sign Off - Jewish Stephen
Now that Stephen is Jewish, he is legally obligated to tell you to call your mother.
The Colbert ReportS7 Stephen Gives Up Catholicism for Lent
Giving up Catholicism for Lent shows Stephen's devotion to the great religion that he no longer practices.
The Colbert ReportS7 Sign Off - Enjoy the Moment
Stephen wants everyone to take a deep breath and enjoy the moment.
The Colbert ReportS7 Newt Gingrich Wants to Screw America
Newt Gingrich only cheated on his wives because he's so passionate about America.
The Colbert ReportS7 Colbert PAC Ad
Stephen launches ColbertPAC.com with his very own high-budget promotional video.
The Colbert ReportS7 Peter King Understands Violent Radicalism
Tennessee fights back against Sharia law, and Peter King holds a hearing to investigate radical American Muslims.
The Colbert ReportS7 Colbert PAC Ad
Stephen shows support for Tim Pawlenty's courage to stand next to Scott Walker with a patriotic message.
The Colbert ReportS7 Intro - 3/10/11
Al Qaeda recruits Americans, and Reza Aslan will talk about the Islamic-American experience if he makes it past Stephen's security.
The Colbert ReportS7 Reza Aslan
Reza Aslan thinks Peter King's hearings to investigate Muslim radicalization are a useless enterprise.
The Colbert ReportS7 Intro - 3/21/11
The escalating conflict in Libya means good news for troops, Stephen's self-portrait goes up for auction, and Steve Martin does some bluegrass.
The Colbert ReportS7 Exclusive - Raging Art-On Pt. 5
Stephen warms up and gives his portrait a pep talk in preparation for the big auction at an art gallery in New York.
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