The Colbert Report
Sign Off - Welcome Zoe Simone Sanchez
Season 7 • 03/08/2011
Stephen asks Zoe Simone Sanchez to let her mom come back to work.
The Colbert ReportS7 Joshua Foer
Joshua Foer explains that having a European coach was like bringing a gun to a knife fight at the U.S. Memory Championship.
The Colbert ReportS7 Art Stephen Up Challenge - Bid on Stephen's Portrait
Stephen invites average Americans with giant sacks of cash to bid on his portrait and unveils the latest no-prize-winning entry.
The Colbert ReportS7 America's Next GOP Model
Every American will sort of remember where they were when Newt Gingrich almost said he might be running for president.
The Colbert ReportS7 Stephen Wants an iPad 2
Stephen would be the appiest man in the world if Apple gave him an iPad 2 and a panini press.
The Colbert ReportS7 Intro - 3/7/11
Stephen reveals the first Republican to enter the presidential race, looks at Obama's past, and asks Joshua Foer where he put his car keys.
The Colbert ReportS7 Light Bulb Ban - Dale Bryk
Dale Bryk says the new and improved incandescent light bulbs use less energy and will put a dent in the deficit.
The Colbert ReportS7 Dan Sinker
Dan Sinker questions the sanity of anyone who actually thought he was Rahm Emanuel on Twitter.
The Colbert ReportS7 Happy Mardi Gras & International Women's Day
Stephen celebrates women's regrettable self-exposure and their achievements on Mardi Gras Day.
The Colbert ReportS7 Charlie Sheen & Fake Rahm Emanuel on Twitter
Charlie Sheen gets a new gig as Twitter overlord, and the fake Rahm Emanuel is unmasked.
The Colbert ReportS7 Light Bulb Ban
The socket huggers claim that pigtail bulbs last up to 10 years, but they haven't considered how the efficient lights will affect the joke-telling industry.
The Colbert ReportS7 Sign Off - Welcome Zoe Simone Sanchez
Stephen is sure Zoe Simone Sanchez is wearing a limited edition Vera Wang onesie.
The Colbert ReportS7 Bench Press - Anthony Weiner
Anthony Weiner wants to ensure that the Supreme Court upholds a standard of ethics by asking Clarence Thomas to recuse himself from health care cases.
The Colbert ReportS7 Intro - 3/9/11
Clarence Thomas may have a conflict of interest, and Stephen hopes David Brooks' book, "The Social Animal," is about a hamster on Facebook.
The Colbert ReportS7 David Brooks
David Brooks describes the way unconscious emotions affect people's decisions and values.
The Colbert ReportS7 Stephen Gives Up Catholicism for Lent
Giving up Catholicism for Lent shows Stephen's devotion to the great religion that he no longer practices.
The Colbert ReportS7 Bench Press
If every Supreme Court justice had to recuse themselves over a conflict of interest, we would never see John Roberts' NASCAR robe.
The Colbert ReportS7 Sign Off - Jewish Stephen
Now that Stephen is Jewish, he is legally obligated to tell you to call your mother.
The Colbert ReportS7 Sign Off - Enjoy the Moment
Stephen wants everyone to take a deep breath and enjoy the moment.
The Colbert ReportS7 Newt Gingrich Wants to Screw America
Newt Gingrich only cheated on his wives because he's so passionate about America.
The Colbert ReportS7 Colbert PAC Ad
Stephen launches ColbertPAC.com with his very own high-budget promotional video.