The Colbert Report

Arianna Huffington

Season 5 • 07/28/2009

Arianna Huffington and Orly Taitz are both politically active and affect wildly ridiculous accents.

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03:04

Health Care Reform Is the Matrix
The Colbert ReportS5

President Obama's health care reform is a dystopian future filled with chaos and floor-length leather trench coats.
07/23/2009
05:59

ThreatDown - Henry Louis Gates Jr., Bill Gates & Wilford Brimley
The Colbert ReportS5

Henry Louis Gates Jr. commits the perfect crime, Bill Gates tries to control the weather, and Wilford Brimley has too much free time.
07/23/2009
00:37

Intro - 7/27/09
The Colbert ReportS5

A report on tasers may shock you, and Swedish band Movits! helps Stephen put his Ikea futon together.
07/27/2009
03:37

Movits!
The Colbert ReportS5

Because the guys from Movits! are from Sweden, they're forced to have the same hair length and glasses.
07/27/2009
02:50

Sarah Palin Will Be Missed
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen says goodbye to Sarah Palin in the same way he imagines she writes her own speeches.
07/27/2009
04:14

Nailed 'Em - Library Crime
The Colbert ReportS5

The local library bans Dominic Philip after spotting a photo of him tooting a kazoo in their summer reading parade.
07/27/2009
04:57

Womb Raiders - Orly Taitz
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen thanks Orly Taitz for being one of the few people willing to compare the Obama administration to Nazi Germany.
07/28/2009
02:11

President Obama's Teachable Moment
The Colbert ReportS5

Obama's teaching: if you arrest a black man under questionable circumstances, you get to have a beer with the president.
07/28/2009
00:20

Sign Off - Devil's Tricks
The Colbert ReportS5

One of the greatest tricks the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.
07/28/2009
06:18

Womb Raiders - The Fight for the Truth Behind Obama's Birth
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen wants to hear from one of the sperm that witnessed President Obama's conception in order to verify his birthplace.
07/28/2009
05:45

Arianna Huffington
The Colbert ReportS5

Arianna Huffington was born in the United States, but she cultivated an accent to give herself an air of being an ethnic minority.
07/28/2009
00:31

Intro - 7/29/09
The Colbert ReportS5

Lance Armstrong comes in third in the Tour de France, and Kevin Baker says Obama is the new Hoover.
07/29/2009
03:19

Sport Report - Tour de France & Robotic Baseball
The Colbert ReportS5

A person who isn't Lance Armstrong wins the Tour de France, and Japanese robots make baseball interesting.
07/29/2009
00:21

Sign Off - Watch Without Blinking
The Colbert ReportS5

If you watch this episode again without blinking, you get three percent more programming.
07/29/2009
03:04

Frank the Roommate
The Colbert ReportS5

After Viacom's profits fall by 32%, Stephen cuts his costs by taking on a roommate.
07/29/2009
05:17

Kevin Baker
The Colbert ReportS5

Kevin Baker believes President Obama sees what needs to be done but is too reluctant to break with Congress.
07/29/2009
06:51

The Word - He Who Smelt It, Dealt It
The Colbert ReportS5

Racism is nothing more than an unpleasant nuisance that is best to ignore, like a fart.
07/29/2009
02:49

White House Beer Summit
The Colbert ReportS5

Barack Obama, Henry Louis Gates Jr. and James Crowley insist on three different brands of foreign beer for their White House meeting.
07/30/2009
00:14

Intro - 7/30/09
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen can't start the show because his roommate, Frank, is sitting at his desk.
07/30/2009
04:37

Kathryn Bigelow
The Colbert ReportS5

Kathryn Bigelow's war movie, "The Hurt Locker," is getting great reviews, despite not having explosions and ear-splitting sound effects.
07/30/2009
03:55

Tip/Wag - Man-Words & Movits!
The Colbert ReportS5

Educators ban man-words from textbooks, and Stephen discovers America's newest pop sensation, Movits!
07/30/2009
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