The Colbert Report

Search for a New Black Friend

Season 2 • 05/16/2006

Stephen has been betrayed by Alan.

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01:32

Summaries of Summaries
The Colbert ReportS2

After seeing an ad for eight-page summaries of popular business books, Stephen takes it a step further by cutting them down to just a few sentences.
05/15/2006
04:32

Ahmadinejad's Letter
The Colbert ReportS2

No matter what a dictator's views are, one should always disagree. For example, Hitler was a vegetarian, so Stephen is not.
05/15/2006
01:08

Craziest F#?king Thing I've Ever Heard - Gas Prices
The Colbert ReportS2

A guy pulls a truck with his ear just to save some money on gas.
05/15/2006
03:21

The Word - Lunchables
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen doesn't see America as a melting pot. He sees it as a package of Lunchables, with separate compartments for separate views.
05/15/2006
02:37

All You Need to Know - Dick Cheney
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen tells you All You Need To Know about Dick Cheney, Chuck Hagel, Rolling Stone and hurricanes.
05/15/2006
00:37

Intro - 5/16/06
The Colbert ReportS2

Steven reports on post-traumatic stress disorder caused by HBO, celebrates illegal immigrants and talks to alternative energy expert Tyson Slocum.
05/16/2006
03:58

The Word - Inoculation
The Colbert ReportS2

The Surgeon General says that an HBO documentary on Baghdad may cause post-traumatic stress disorder, so you probably shouldn't watch it.
05/16/2006
02:49

Body Parts for Sale
The Colbert ReportS2

After reading an article about the black market body parts industry, Stephen has decided to auction off all of his body parts.
05/16/2006
07:05

Tyson Slocum
The Colbert ReportS2

Tyson Slocum talks about alternative energy sources, and Stephen gives him the debate of his career.
05/16/2006
02:26

Billboard
The Colbert ReportS2

While flipping through his latest issue of Star magazine, Stephen spotted his billboard in the background of a picture of Tom Cruise.
05/16/2006
03:09

Search for a New Black Friend
The Colbert ReportS2

After seeing his black friend, Alan, at an anti-war protest, Stephen has decided to look for a new black friend.
05/16/2006
03:07

The Word - Democrats
The Colbert ReportS2

After Republicans gave President Bush flack for his immigration speech, Stephen felt it was time to get them back on the same page.
05/17/2006
00:37

Intro - 5/17/06
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen profiles Teddy Roosevelt, speaks with Jonathan Alter about America's greatest president and calls off the New Deal.
05/17/2006
03:43

Reagan Dimes
The Colbert ReportS2

In support of the new proposal for Ronald Reagan dimes, fellow Americans should get rid of all their old FDR dimes.
05/17/2006
05:39

Better Know a President - Theodore Roosevelt
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen talks to Theodore Roosevelt about hunting, mounting, child labor and his niece, Eleanor.
05/17/2006
00:13

Boycott
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen begins his boycott of vitamin C.
05/17/2006
06:29

Jonathan Alter
The Colbert ReportS2

Author Jonathan Alter calls Theodore Roosevelt the Bing Crosby of presidents; Stephen calls George W. Bush the FDR of today.
05/17/2006
05:10

Difference Makers - Tim Donnelly
The Colbert ReportS2

Tim Donnelly rallies 100 citizens to sing the national anthem -- in "English."
05/18/2006
03:30

Stephen Colbert's Guardian Eagles
The Colbert ReportS2

Today's prom is a minefield for our youth -- the sex, the gangsta rapping music, the drinking, the smoking of the grass and the smoking of the ecstasy pills.
05/18/2006
00:07

Fract - This Day in Stephen History
The Colbert ReportS2

On this day in Stephen history, Stephen won the school science fair.
05/18/2006
06:05

Ted Daeschler
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen asks paleontologists Ted Daeschler why he can't just leave fossils alone to ripen into oil.
05/18/2006
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