The Colbert Report
Season 5 • 05/11/2009
Stephen's credit card has been pre-approved for its own credit card.
The Colbert ReportS5 Smokin' Pole - The Fight for Arctic Riches: Inuit Nation
Arctic nations rush to stake claims in polar territories, even though it clearly belongs to America -- Superman lives there.
The Colbert ReportS5 Mitchell Joachim
Mitchell Joachim imagines soft cars and blimp bumper buses for cities in the future.
The Colbert ReportS5 Spay and Neuter Your Pets
Remember, have your pets spayed or neutered. Animal members of the Colbert Nation: run!
The Colbert ReportS5 Sean Hannity's Liberty Tree
Thank you, Sean Hannity, for taking us to the Liberty Tree instead of going miles out of the way to the Making Sense Bush.
The Colbert ReportS5 Sign Off - Unicorn Dealership
If you dream about Stephen tonight, he'll see you at the unicorn dealership.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 5/11/09
Congress cracks down on credit card companies, and Jeff Daniels' Broadway play sounds like a great video game.
The Colbert ReportS5 Alpha Dog of the Week - Erik Slye
The case of the Montana Legal System v. Dog's Ball Wrinkles sets a legal precedent.
The Colbert ReportS5 Stephen's Fancy Feast
When Stephen sends his assistant to get pate, she only brings back the fanciest of feasts.
The Colbert ReportS5 Credit Card Industry Regulation - Tamara Draut
Tamara Draut believes industry regulation is necessary now that Americans are using credit for basic necessities.
The Colbert ReportS5 Jeff Daniels
Jeff Daniels' explains how the play "God of Carnage" shows what happens once the mask of civility is taken away.
The Colbert ReportS5 Credit Check
Credit card companies are part of an honest industry just trying to make 30% on a buck.
The Colbert ReportS5 Howard's End
The Vatican's hesitation to boycott Ron Howard's movie, "Angels & Demons," shocks and dismays Stephen.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 5/12/09
The embargo on Cuba could be lifted, and Ron Howard discusses his directorial work on the most anti-Catholic film since "Sister Act 2."
The Colbert ReportS5 Cuba/US Trade Relations - Julia Sweig
Julia Sweig explains why America should bother opening trade relations with Cuba.
The Colbert ReportS5 Stephen's Sound Advice - How to Re-Brand the GOP
The GOP needs to make painful, soul-searching, superficial changes to their image without altering anything inside.
The Colbert ReportS5 You Are a Dummy
If you were offended by any part of the show, it's probably when Stephen called you dumb, dummy.
The Colbert ReportS5 Ron Howard
Ron Howard tells Stephen that "Angels & Demons" is about Robert Langdon saving the church, even though Jesus already did that.
The Colbert ReportS5 Our Plan in Havana
Europeans try to take Americans' Cuba cash by lifting trade restrictions before the US.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 5/13/09
The government has a new method for funding health care, and Michael Pollan defends food.
The Colbert ReportS5 Stephen's Coke Party Protest
Stephen is already twitching with excitement over his Coke-fueled party to protest the soda tax.
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