The Colbert Report

The Word - Join the European Union

Season 4 • 07/23/2008

Our money would be just as strong as the euro, if our money was the euro.

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05:49

Margaret Spellings
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen asks Margaret Spellings if federally mandated spanking would help our kids do better in school.
07/22/2008
04:30

The Word - Fight to the Furnish
The Colbert ReportS4

Thank you, Air Force, for using your anti-terror funds to defeat Al Qaeda in style.
07/22/2008
00:38

Intro - 7/22/08
The Colbert ReportS4

The Air Force unveils a new strategy in the war on terror. Terrorists, kindly switch over to "Nightline."
07/22/2008
02:43

Elton John's New Ice Cream
The Colbert ReportS4

If Ben and Jerry make Stephen share a freezer with Sir Elton John, he insists they print on his label "May contain trace amounts of sequins."
07/22/2008
02:52

South Carolina is So Gay
The Colbert ReportS4

South Carolina is a state where big strapping straight men reenact Civil War battles and then shower together for historical accuracy.
07/22/2008
02:55

Obama's Trip
The Colbert ReportS4

All of the big anchors are covering Barack Obama's trip, which means Stephen Colbert is America's most trusted remaining name in news.
07/22/2008
04:19

ColorofChange.org Petition
The Colbert ReportS4

Nas responds to Bill O'Reilly like the gangsta that he is -- with a petition.
07/23/2008
00:32

Intro - 7/23/08
The Colbert ReportS4

How bad is our economy? Stephen gives you his two cents, which used to be a dollar.
07/23/2008
04:38

Nas Pt. 1
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen wants to know why Nas challenged Bill O'Reilly to a debate instead of a freestyle rap contest.
07/23/2008
02:18

Starbucks Closings
The Colbert ReportS4

The "Save Our Starbucks" campaign is the kind of grass-roots activism Stephen likes -- the kind that helps sprawling corporate behemoths.
07/23/2008
04:43

The Word - Join the European Union
The Colbert ReportS4

If the European Union doesn't let us in, we'll sue them for geographic discrimination.
07/23/2008
05:24

Laurie Goodstein
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen asks Laurie Goodstein why Anglicans can't just ordain gay priests and then not talk about it -- like the Catholics.
07/24/2008
06:08

Garrett Reisman
The Colbert ReportS4

Astronaut Garrett Reisman tells Stephen he wrote the secret codes to the self-destruct mechanism on his WristStrong bracelet.
07/24/2008
03:14

ThreatDown - Greek Courts
The Colbert ReportS4

You don't have to be from Lesbos to be a lesbian.
07/24/2008
03:17

John McCain's Sausage Party
The Colbert ReportS4

While Barack Obama delivers a speech to thousands of fans in Germany, John McCain eats lunch at Schmidt's Sausage Haus.
07/24/2008
00:15

Decoder Rings
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen has a message for his viewers who have Colbert Report decoder rings: there are no decoder rings.
07/24/2008
00:38

Intro - 7/24/08
The Colbert ReportS4

The Anglican church is split over gay priests. It's the biggest religious controversy since Scientologists decided to admit gay thetans.
07/24/2008
04:01

Trigger Happy - D.C. v. Heller
The Colbert ReportS4

Allowing former convicts to have guns will give them the confidence to go out and make new friends and/or hostages.
07/28/2008
04:34

Heroic Refusal to Discuss Robert Novak
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen takes some calls to hear what his viewers think about his difficult decision to not talk about Robert Novak.
07/28/2008
03:17

Obama Returns
The Colbert ReportS4

John McCain warns the media that Barack Obama is not the man he appears to be, because he appears to be president.
07/28/2008
00:36

Intro - 7/28/08
The Colbert ReportS4

Barack Obama returns from his trip overseas. Stephen hopes he brought back the present he asked for: a concession speech.
07/28/2008
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