The Colbert Report

Sign Off - Goodnight

Season 7 • 08/02/2011

Stephen shoots WristStrong bands and says goodnight.

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04:18

The Word - With Great Power Comes No Responsibility
The Colbert ReportS7

With the proposed Super Congress, only 12 lawmakers will have to make unpopular recommendations, and the rest of Congress can avoid blame.
08/01/2011
05:51

"Three Billy Goats Gruff" Budget Negotiations
The Colbert ReportS7

When handling budget negotiations, Troll Obama should never have let the Republican billy goats clomp over his bridge.
08/01/2011
00:34

Intro - 8/1/11
The Colbert ReportS7

Barack Obama makes a deal with Republicans, a new technology honors the dead, and Zappos' C.E.O. Tony Hsieh always does free returns.
08/01/2011
03:05

From Ashes to Bullets
The Colbert ReportS7

Alabama company Holy Smoke turns loved ones' ashes into real bullets that can be used to hunt turkeys on Thanksgiving.
08/01/2011
03:58

America's Credit Grating - David Leonhardt
The Colbert ReportS7

According to The New York Times' David Leonhardt, safeguarding America's credit rating requires reducing health costs and raising taxes.
08/02/2011
00:34

Intro - 8/2/11
The Colbert ReportS7

America's credit rating may be downgraded, the recession affects children, and Al Hunt has 42 years of journalistic experience in Washington.
08/02/2011
03:18

America's Credit Grating
The Colbert ReportS7

America should handle credit ratings agencies the way it does all terrorists: by marching the marines into their offices and whisking them off to Gitmo.
08/02/2011
03:47

Newt Gingrich's Twitter Scandal
The Colbert ReportS7

Allegations arise that 80% of Newt Gingrich's Twitter followers aren't real, but making up people may be the key to keeping his campaign alive.
08/02/2011
05:41

Al Hunt
The Colbert ReportS7

Bloomberg News' Al Hunt believes Barack Obama lost the debt ceiling negotiation, but he doesn't think the Republicans won.
08/02/2011
03:04

Baby Teeth Economy
The Colbert ReportS7

In order to get the soft tooth market back up, kids must reduce baby teeth inventory and stop losing teeth.
08/02/2011
00:07

Sign Off - Goodnight
The Colbert ReportS7

Stephen shoots WristStrong bands into the audience and says goodnight.
08/02/2011
00:07

Sign Off - Official Flag Updater
The Colbert ReportS7

Stephen considers the legitimacy of the states in his American flag sampler.
08/03/2011
07:30

ThreatDown - Fake States, Sharia Weather & Monopoly
The Colbert ReportS7

The state of North Dakota may not exist, subversive weather blows into Arizona, and the classic American game of anti-trust law violation gets a makeover.
08/03/2011
04:42

Women's Health-Nazi Plan
The Colbert ReportS7

Free birth control will wipe out the American race and instantly turn daughters into wanton harlots with insatiable sexual appetites.
08/03/2011
00:37

Intro - 8/3/11
The Colbert ReportS7

An old kids' game gets updated, the government gives women new health guidelines, and Robert Wittman investigates art crime.
08/03/2011
05:09

Robert Wittman
The Colbert ReportS7

Art crime investigator Robert Wittman recovers stolen paintings around the world and explains the challenges of museum security.
08/03/2011
02:32

Multiracial Spider-Man
The Colbert ReportS7

A half-black, half-Hispanic Spider-Man replaces a dead Peter Parker, setting a terrible precedent for superhero diversity.
08/03/2011
00:34

Intro - 8/4/11
The Colbert ReportS7

Somebody snuck a vegetable into Wisconsin, baseball's cherished records face a threat, and Anthony Bourdain travels the world in search of great food.
08/04/2011
02:52

Wisconsin's Recall Election & Americans for Prosperity's Absentee Ballot Typos
The Colbert ReportS7

The Koch brothers-funded Americans for Prosperity PAC sends absentee ballot applications with minor inaccuracies to Wisconsin's Democratic districts.
08/04/2011
04:47

Anthony Bourdain
The Colbert ReportS7

Chef Anthony Bourdain worries about the ballooning of Americans and occasionally eats endangered birds with a hood over his head.
08/04/2011
00:06

Sign Off - Goodnight
The Colbert ReportS7

Stephen signs off by saying goodnight.
08/04/2011
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