The Colbert Report
Season 3 • 03/28/2007
In his book, Jabari Asim travels through time with the "N" word.
Madeleine AlbrightThe Colbert ReportS3
Though Stephen is excited for the imminent World War III, Madeleine Albright explains that Armageddon is not exactly a foreign policy.
Sean Penn Unleashes on President BushThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen challenges Sean Penn to a battle of the metaphors after Penn's attack on the president.
Tip/Wag - Drug DealersThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen wags his finger at drug dealers and tips his cap to GLAAD and mansheep.
Intro - 3/2707The Colbert ReportS3
Sean Penn insults the president, Stephen asks if we should go to war with Iran, and guest James Fallows discusses what went wrong in Iraq.
Sign Off - Going to Bed AngryThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen encourages his audience not to go to bed angry with each other.
Claim to the ArcticThe Colbert ReportS3
Since no one yet has territorial claims to the South Pole, Stephen suggests planting an American flag and a Colbert Nation flag.
The Word - Monkey BusinessThe Colbert ReportS3
With scientists trying to prove that morality has a biological basis, Stephen thinks it's about time for religion to take things away from science.
Intro - 3/28/07The Colbert ReportS3
Stephen proves that evolution does not exist, says which countries are threatening America, and interviews author Jabari Asim.
Dancing With the StarsThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen knows who's behind supermodel Paulina Porizkova getting voted off "Dancing With the Stars."
The Axis of Evil of the WeekThe Colbert ReportS3
Italy exchanged five Taliban members for an Italian journalist, bestowing upon themselves the honor of being the third member of the Axis of Evil for the week.
Jabari AsimThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen suggests blaming the pilgrims for the origin of the "N" Word.
Equal RightsThe Colbert ReportS3
Feminists can burn their bras, but they won't get the one Stephen's wearing.
Alpha Dog of the Week - TobyThe Colbert ReportS3
This week's Alpha Dog is an actual dog, who saved his owner's life by doing the Heimlich.
The Word - Lemon-RaidThe Colbert ReportS3
We're not going to lose the Iraq war because for all we know, we may have already won.
Clive JamesThe Colbert ReportS3
Clive James, author of "Cultural Amnesia," asks Stephen if he has to put some thought into appearing so thoughtless.
Nightgown Novel ModelThe Colbert ReportS3
If Stephen knows anything about the ladies, it's that they long to escape into a world of romance.
Sign Off - It's Been RealThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen gives the audience a reality check.
Strolling in BaghdadThe Colbert ReportS3
John McCain claps his hands and believes that Baghdad is safe for Americans.
Intro - 3/29/07The Colbert ReportS3
Stephen discusses cultural amnesia with author Clive James and Congress tries to bring back the Equal Rights Amendment.
Sign Off - Goodnight, LadiesThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen says goodnight -- to the ladies.
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