The Colbert Report
Rioting Do's and Don'ts
Season 1 • 11/07/2005
Stephen offers advice to rioters in Paris.
Better Know a District - Ohio's 11th - Stephanie Tubbs JonesThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen Colbert and Stephanie Tubbs Jones discuss Lincoln's hobbies.
The Word - Shhhh!...The Colbert ReportS1
During Bush's first term, we didn't want to know all the depressing things that were going on, and the press had the savvy not to try and find out.
Judge TubbsThe Colbert ReportS1
The Colbert Report hires Ohio Representative Stephanie Tubbs Jones to be its new legal expert.
Intro - 11/3/05The Colbert ReportS1
Ladies of a certain age, The Colbert Report gives you -- Bradley Whitford
Rock 'Em Sock 'Em RobotsThe Colbert ReportS1
On the fifth anniversary of George W. Bush's presidential election, Stephen uses Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots to illustrate the anger of the citizens.
Intro - 11/7/05The Colbert ReportS1
Revolution in Paris, The Report in Canada, Eliot Spitzer in the studio and another Christmas tradition threatened: all coming up!
Eliot SpitzerThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen speak with governor-hopeful Eliot Spitzer about campaign costs, his chances of winning and if he agrees that bears are a major threat.
Fract - Frnap: The Freedom SnapThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen introduces the Freedom Snap: the Frnap -- which shouts an insult at your country.
The Word - HoserThe Colbert ReportS1
After Canada picked up The Colbert Report, Stephen began to rethink his ill feelings towards the country that was once put on notice.
ThreatDown - PiratesThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen warns us about pirates, Canadian optometrists, professional musicians, mixing romance with NASCAR, and of course, bears.
Rioting Do's and Don'tsThe Colbert ReportS1
Smashing windows and burning cars are both riot essentials.
Yet Another Day - Flesh-Eating VirusThe Colbert ReportS1
Tomorrow morning on "Yet Another Day," Christina tells you how to avoid contracting a flesh-eating virus.
Intercepted Satellite FeedThe Colbert ReportS1
Bloggers intercepted satellite feed of Stephen's interview with Bradley Whitford and posted the footage on the Internet.
Tip/Wag - Convicted MurderersThe Colbert ReportS1
Prisons holding murderers should step up their level of security to, say, that of a local bar.
The Word - T.O.The Colbert ReportS1
The Philadelphia Eagles are suspending Terrell Owens for the rest of the season. But they've forgotten something: Terrell is a very good football player.
Fract - Franagram: American PatriotThe Colbert ReportS1
"American Patriot" anagrams to "I am an erotic part."
Wilford Brimley Calls - CocoonThe Colbert ReportS1
Wilford Brimley doesn't understand why Stephen isn't using the cocoon he sent as a set decoration.
America Doesn't TortureThe Colbert ReportS1
The president says that America doesn't do anything illegal. Torture is illegal. Ergo -- and that's Latin for "bite me" -- we do not torture.
Intro - 11/8/05The Colbert ReportS1
On the agenda: Terrell Owens, torture, Christmas tradition and Court TV's Catherine Crier.
Catherine CrierThe Colbert ReportS1
To get into the news business, Catherine Crier said, "Boys, I've got a camera in the living room. You wanna come over and make a tape?"
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