The Colbert Report
Season 1 • 11/08/2005
Catherine Crier knows where her bread is buttered: close to the crust.
The Colbert ReportS1 The Word - Hoser
After Canada picked up The Colbert Report, Stephen began to rethink his ill feelings towards the country that was once put on notice.
The Colbert ReportS1 ThreatDown - Pirates
Stephen warns us about pirates, Canadian optometrists, professional musicians, mixing romance with NASCAR, and of course, bears.
The Colbert ReportS1 Yet Another Day - Flesh-Eating Virus
Tomorrow morning on "Yet Another Day," Christina tells you how to avoid contracting a flesh-eating virus.
The Colbert ReportS1 Intercepted Satellite Feed
Bloggers intercepted satellite feed of Stephen's interview with Bradley Whitford and posted the footage on the Internet.
The Colbert ReportS1 Tip/Wag - Convicted Murderers
Prisons holding murderers should step up their level of security to, say, that of a local bar.
The Colbert ReportS1 The Word - T.O.
The Philadelphia Eagles are suspending Terrell Owens for the rest of the season. But they've forgotten something: Terrell is a very good football player.
The Colbert ReportS1 Fract - Franagram: American Patriot
"American Patriot" anagrams to "I am an erotic part."
The Colbert ReportS1 Wilford Brimley Calls - Cocoon
Wilford Brimley doesn't understand why Stephen isn't using the cocoon he sent as a set decoration.
The Colbert ReportS1 America Doesn't Torture
The president says that America doesn't do anything illegal. Torture is illegal. Ergo -- and that's Latin for "bite me" -- we do not torture.
The Colbert ReportS1 Intro - 11/8/05
On the agenda: Terrell Owens, torture, Christmas tradition and Court TV's Catherine Crier.
The Colbert ReportS1 Catherine Crier
To get into the news business, Catherine Crier said, "Boys, I've got a camera in the living room. You wanna come over and make a tape?"
The Colbert ReportS1 Intro - 11/9/05
Arnold Schwarzenegger's propositions are turned down at the ballot box, and Stephen looks forward to talking with author Mary Roach.
The Colbert ReportS1 Mary Roach
Stephen and author Mary Roach contact a spirit from the past in the studio.
The Colbert ReportS1 Better Know a District - Florida's 7th - John Mica
Congressman John Mica stands for his district with the tenacity of an alligator that shows up in your garage after a hurricane.
The Colbert ReportS1 The Word - Willy Loman
Mr. Schwarzenegger, get back to what you do best: jamming Arnold into people's holes.
The Colbert ReportS1 Next Question
At the recent White House press briefings it looks like Scott McClellan is about to crap his pants or burst into tears.
The Colbert ReportS1 All You Need to Know - Kansas Education
The Kansas Board of Education approves the teaching of intelligent design in the classroom.
The Colbert ReportS1 Cokie Roberts
Cokie Roberts recalls an old Washington, where people could disagree without being disagreeable.
The Colbert ReportS1 Intro - 11/10/05
Congress hard at work, the re-branding of Veteran's Day and Cokie Roberts -- all on tonight's show.
The Colbert ReportS1 The DaColbert Code - Samuel Alito
Stephen uses The DaColbert Code to pierce the veil of secrecy and solve modern-day mysteries.
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