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The Colbert Report
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The Colbert Report
Tip/Wag - Convicted Murderers
Season 1 • 11/08/2005
The prison system, upside-down traditions and black holes get hearty wags.
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Watching
03:32
The Word - Hoser
The Colbert Report
S1
After Canada picked up The Colbert Report, Stephen began to rethink his ill feelings towards the country that was once put on notice.
11/07/2005
03:46
ThreatDown - Pirates
The Colbert Report
S1
Stephen warns us about pirates, Canadian optometrists, professional musicians, mixing romance with NASCAR, and of course, bears.
11/07/2005
00:41
Yet Another Day - Flesh-Eating Virus
The Colbert Report
S1
Tomorrow morning on "Yet Another Day," Christina tells you how to avoid contracting a flesh-eating virus.
11/08/2005
01:28
Intercepted Satellite Feed
The Colbert Report
S1
Bloggers intercepted satellite feed of Stephen's interview with Bradley Whitford and posted the footage on the Internet.
11/08/2005
02:21
The Word - T.O.
The Colbert Report
S1
The Philadelphia Eagles are suspending Terrell Owens for the rest of the season. But they've forgotten something: Terrell is a very good football player.
11/08/2005
00:08
Fract - Franagram: American Patriot
The Colbert Report
S1
"American Patriot" anagrams to "I am an erotic part."
11/08/2005
01:48
Wilford Brimley Calls - Cocoon
The Colbert Report
S1
Wilford Brimley doesn't understand why Stephen isn't using the cocoon he sent as a set decoration.
11/08/2005
01:13
America Doesn't Torture
The Colbert Report
S1
The president says that America doesn't do anything illegal. Torture is illegal. Ergo -- and that's Latin for "bite me" -- we do not torture.
11/08/2005
00:31
Intro - 11/8/05
The Colbert Report
S1
On the agenda: Terrell Owens, torture, Christmas tradition and Court TV's Catherine Crier.
11/08/2005
07:20
Catherine Crier
The Colbert Report
S1
To get into the news business, Catherine Crier said, "Boys, I've got a camera in the living room. You wanna come over and make a tape?"
11/08/2005
03:25
Tip/Wag - Convicted Murderers
The Colbert Report
S1
Prisons holding murderers should step up their level of security to, say, that of a local bar.
11/08/2005
00:27
Intro - 11/9/05
The Colbert Report
S1
Arnold Schwarzenegger's propositions are turned down at the ballot box, and Stephen looks forward to talking with author Mary Roach.
11/09/2005
05:50
Mary Roach
The Colbert Report
S1
Stephen and author Mary Roach contact a spirit from the past in the studio.
11/09/2005
05:14
Better Know a District - Florida's 7th - John Mica
The Colbert Report
S1
Congressman John Mica stands for his district with the tenacity of an alligator that shows up in your garage after a hurricane.
11/09/2005
03:47
The Word - Willy Loman
The Colbert Report
S1
Mr. Schwarzenegger, get back to what you do best: jamming Arnold into people's holes.
11/09/2005
02:18
Next Question
The Colbert Report
S1
At the recent White House press briefings it looks like Scott McClellan is about to crap his pants or burst into tears.
11/09/2005
02:18
All You Need to Know - Kansas Education
The Colbert Report
S1
The Kansas Board of Education approves the teaching of intelligent design in the classroom.
11/09/2005
05:43
Cokie Roberts
The Colbert Report
S1
Cokie Roberts recalls an old Washington, where people could disagree without being disagreeable.
11/10/2005
00:34
Intro - 11/10/05
The Colbert Report
S1
Congress hard at work, the re-branding of Veteran's Day and Cokie Roberts -- all on tonight's show.
11/10/2005
03:30
The DaColbert Code - Samuel Alito
The Colbert Report
S1
Stephen uses The DaColbert Code to pierce the veil of secrecy and solve modern-day mysteries.
11/10/2005
02:56
The In-Box - Asian Stereotypes
The Colbert Report
S1
In an attempt to apologize for accidentally perpetuating an Asian stereotype, Stephen shares some of The Report's airtime with its sister station in Osaka.
11/10/2005
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