The Colbert Report

Sign Off - Goodnight

Season 9 • 09/17/2013

Stephen blows a kiss.

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00:34

The Colbert ReportS9
Intro - 9/16/13

Americans abuse the social safety net, controversy strikes the Miss America Pageant, and retired army Colonel Andrew Bacevich talks about national service.
09/16/2013
04:54

The Colbert ReportS9
Miss America 2013

Miss South Carolina talks about her state's mobile homes, and Twitter users slander the first Miss America of Indian descent.
09/16/2013
05:30

The Colbert ReportS9
Andrew Bacevich

Vietnam veteran Andrew Bacevich discusses his book, "Breach of Trust: How Americans Failed Their Soldiers and Their Country."
09/16/2013
06:35

The Colbert ReportS9
The Word - The Guilted Age

As more Americans apply for food stamps and disability benefits, conservative pundits and independent crusaders believe it's good to shame them.
09/16/2013
03:22

The Colbert ReportS9
Lehman Brothers Anniversary & Economic Recovery

America's economy is back after the 2008 Lehman Brothers collapse, but only for the top 1 percent.
09/16/2013
04:19

The Colbert ReportS9
Soul-Rending Cheerios Ad

Cheerios leverages the death of a grandparent and joins the ranks of undead endorsed cereals like Count Chocula.
09/17/2013
00:32

The Colbert ReportS9
Intro - 9/17/13

The rich have it better than the poor, the cereal industry makes progress, and U.S. Secretary of Education Arne Duncan sits down with Stephen.
09/17/2013
03:18

The Colbert ReportS9
The People's Republic of Obamastan & Forbes 400 Losers

President Obama pits the unattainably rich against the unimaginably rich, and 61 billionaires fail to make the Forbes 400 list.
09/17/2013
06:41

The Colbert ReportS9
Colbert Platinum - Luxury Ice & Hot Dic-Tip

Dean & DeLuca advertises 10 hand-carved ice cubes for $75, and Jennifer Lopez sings "Happy Birthday" to an Asian despot.
09/17/2013
05:51

The Colbert ReportS9
Arne Duncan

U.S. Secretary of Education Arne Duncan discusses Obama's Race to the Top initiative and Preschool for All program.
09/17/2013
00:06

The Colbert ReportS9
Sign Off - Goodnight

Stephen blows a kiss goodnight.
09/17/2013
03:41

The Colbert ReportS9
Navy Yard Shooting & Gun Violence Causes

Fox News complains about background checks after the Navy Yard shooting, and Eric Bolling wonders who started blaming video games for gun violence.
09/18/2013
00:06

The Colbert ReportS9
Sign Off - "Damascus Countdown"

Stephen reads Joel Rosenberg's apocalyptic novel.
09/18/2013
05:15

The Colbert ReportS9
Syria Conflict & End Times Prophecy

According to Fox News' Neil Cavuto and Armageddon enthusiast Joel Rosenberg, the Syrian conflict may bring about the apocalypse.
09/18/2013
06:11

The Colbert ReportS9
Nicholson Baker

Author Nicholson Baker discusses his garden metaphor for life and his desire to rename genitalia.
09/18/2013
05:44

The Colbert ReportS9
United Nations on Syria Conflict - Andrew Sullivan

Political blogger Andrew Sullivan trusts the U.N. Security Council more than America to resolve the crisis in Syria.
09/18/2013
03:56

The Colbert ReportS9
Jack Johnson

Singer-songwriter Jack Johnson talks about rock 'n' roll, the "Hawaiian Grammys" and love songs.
09/19/2013
03:55

The Colbert ReportS9
Tip/Wag - Hammunition & George Clooney

An Idaho company creates pork-laced bullets to fight Muslim extremists, and George Clooney uses a spy satellite to track Omar al-Bashir's army in Sudan.
09/19/2013
03:12

The Colbert ReportS9
Obamacare Navigators

Republican lawmakers in Florida restrict Obamacare navigators because they might steal the identity of the uninsured poor.
09/19/2013
03:13

The Colbert ReportS9
Obamacare Government Shutdown

Republicans threaten to shut down the federal government if Democrats don't vote to defund Obamacare.
09/19/2013
02:51

The Colbert ReportS9
Michelle Obama's H2O Campaign

First Lady Michelle Obama crams her pro-health agenda down Americans' throats -- throats that should be packed with chili cheese fries.
09/19/2013
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