The Colbert Report

Human Week

Season 5 • 08/05/2009

If the Discovery Channel really wants to frighten us, they should have Human Week.

More

Watching

00:31

The Colbert ReportS5
Intro - 8/3/09

President Obama finds a way to pay for health care, and General Anthony Zinni will wax Stephen's chest.
08/03/2009
04:57

The Colbert ReportS5
The Word - Hippie Replacement

Soon America's grassroots people-power movements will be rid of the one thing that's holding them back: people.
08/04/2009
06:24

The Colbert ReportS5
Kurt Andersen

According to Kurt Andersen, the economic and health crises give Americans a brief chance to get things where they want them.
08/04/2009
00:10

The Colbert ReportS5
Sign Off - Love Makes the World Go Round

Love makes the world go round, so stop hogging all the credit, physics.
08/04/2009
04:57

The Colbert ReportS5
Colbert Bump Cocktail - David Wondrich

David Wondrich serves Stephen drinks from the Great Depression and the Civil War, and invents a Colbert Bump cocktail.
08/04/2009
02:42

The Colbert ReportS5
Merry Barackmas

Karl Marx takes gifts from Stephen to give to lazy people who don't deserve nice things.
08/04/2009
08:11

The Colbert ReportS5
2010 Midterms - Joe Sestak

Joe Sestak is running against Arlen Specter for the Pennsylvania Senate seat so he can bring health care reform to all Americans.
08/05/2009
02:44

The Colbert ReportS5
Bill Clinton's Personal Appearance

Bill Clinton frees two journalists from North Korea, but Laura Ling leaves without her delicious sandwich.
08/05/2009
05:49

The Colbert ReportS5
Kris Kobach

Kris Kobach wants to fight illegal immigration on the local level and reward the people willing to come to this country legally.
08/05/2009
00:02

The Colbert ReportS5
Sign Off - Goodnight

Stephen says goodnight.
08/05/2009
03:13

The Colbert ReportS5
Human Week

Since sharks don't kill that many people, the Discovery Channel should replace their Shark Week with Human Week.
08/05/2009
06:03

The Colbert ReportS5
Meryl Streep

Meryl Streep won't feel responsible if her role as Julia Child influences kids to think cooking is cool.
08/06/2009
00:34

The Colbert ReportS5
Intro - 8/6/09

Stephen reviews the movies that are destroying America and talks to Meryl Streep about her role as Julia Child.
08/06/2009
06:00

The Colbert ReportS5
Yahweh or No Way - Dinosaur Adventure Land & Black Market Kidneys

The founder of a creationist dinosaur theme park refuses to pay taxes, President Obama may be a secret Mormon, and a Jewish man trades kidneys on the black market.
08/06/2009
00:04

The Colbert ReportS5
Sign Off - Goodnight

That's it for The Report, everybody.
08/06/2009
02:27

The Colbert ReportS5
Back to School With Jeremih

Chicago Public Schools officials appoint Jeremih, the guy who sings "Birthday Sex," as their new back-to-school spokesman.
08/06/2009
04:32

The Colbert ReportS5
Movies That Are Destroying America - Summer

"G.I. Joe" helps the French, and "Orphan" doesn't go far enough in reversing the harmful stereotype that adoption is good.
08/06/2009
05:42

The Colbert ReportS5
Barbara Boxer

Barbara Boxer's new novel, "Blind Trust," is about a liberal California senator involved in a scandal, but it's not a veiled confession.
08/10/2009
00:33

The Colbert ReportS5
Intro - 8/10/09

Vladimir Putin returns to the spotlight, and Stephen interviews Barbara Boxer with deaf suspicion.
08/10/2009
04:54

The Colbert ReportS5
Cold War Update - Cuba & Topless Putin

Obama stops a pro-democracy ticker, Cuba runs out of toilet paper, and Vladimir Putin goes topless on his Siberian vacation.
08/10/2009
00:15

The Colbert ReportS5
Sign Off - Encore

It can't be the end of the show, so Stephen's going to stick around and see if he does an encore.
08/10/2009
You may also like5 Videos
Trailer
00:15

The Daily ShowS28
The Daily Show Welcomes Guest Host John Leguizamo

Comedian and actor John Leguizamo takes a seat at The Daily Show desk as guest host, starting Monday at 11/10c.
03/24/2023
Trailer
01:00

Fires and Full Moons Breed a New Terror on Wolf Pack

A California wildfire awakens a werewolf, but a group of curious teens -- once bitten -- will not shy away from the threat of decimation on Wolf Pack, streaming January 26 on Paramount+.
10/12/2022
Trailer
02:29

A Familiar Face Returns in Teen Wolf: The Movie

Derek Hale finds himself fighting for his life when a skilled hunter tracks down him and his son Eli in Teen Wolf: The Movie, premiering Thursday, January 26, 2023, on Paramount+.
10/12/2022
Trailer
01:41

Cursed Friends
This Game of M.A.S.H. Is a Real Monster in Cursed Friends

Four pals must break an evil spell and change their fates when a classic kid's game to predict the future comes back to haunt them in the Comedy Central original movie Cursed Friends.
10/10/2022
Trailer
01:22

Out of Office
Out of Office Explores Remote Work Absurdity

A young woman experiences the bizarre extremes of working from home in the film Out of Office, starring Milana Vayntrub, Ken Jeong, Jay Pharoah, Cheri Oteri, Jason Alexander and more.
09/19/2022