The Colbert Report
Intro - 4/29/09
Season 5 • 04/29/2009
Stephen flips to the back of the book to see if our nation has an education problem.
The Colbert ReportS5 Arlen Specter Contracts Donkey Flu
Republicans tried to fight off donkey flu, but their white cells weren't strong enough.
The Colbert ReportS5 No Animals Were Harmed
No animals were harmed, but after the credits roll, all bets are off.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 4/28/09
Stephen learns what it takes to be a foreign correspondent, besides a pad, a pencil and an anti-American bias, and drinks are on Daniel Gross.
The Colbert ReportS5 Where and When Is Stephen Going to the Persian Gulf? - Correspondents
After taking into consideration his American hero and United Airlines platinum member status, Stephen is going to the Persian Gulf, third and third-most, as a journalist.
The Colbert ReportS5 Foreign Reporting - Richard Engel
Richard Engel shares with Stephen the customary tip for a soldier who saves your life.
The Colbert ReportS5 Feet Teeth
Don't forget to brush your teeth, including your feet teeth.
The Colbert ReportS5 Enemy Swine: A Pigcalypse Now
Stephen calms everyone down with his advice on swine flu.
The Colbert ReportS5 David Kessler
David Kessler wants to save lives by getting Americans to eat less.
The Colbert ReportS5 I's On Edjukashun - Textbooks, AmeriCorps & Strip-Search
Fox News exposes liberal textbooks, AmeriCorps increases its mind control, and a girl is strip-searched for ibuprofen.
The Colbert ReportS5 Ahmadinejad Steals Obama's Slogan
Obama should have anticipated that Mahmoud Ahmadinejad would copy him and picked a more effective anti-nuclear campaign slogan.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 4/29/09
The nation may have an education problem, and David Kessler thinks Americans eat too much, which means he must have eyes.
The Colbert ReportS5 Ethan Nadelmann
Ethan Nadelmann wants to remove marijuana from the criminal justice system and put it into the taxation and regulation systems.
The Colbert ReportS5 President Obama - The First 14 Mondays
The true test of a president: running the country while living Garfield's worst nightmare.
The Colbert ReportS5 Obama's First 14 Mondays - Jonathan Alter
Jonathan Alter tells Stephen how Obama's first 14 Mondays stack up against FDR's.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 4/30/09
President Obama finally completes his first 100 days, and don't tell Ethan Nadelmann Stephen's wearing a wire.
The Colbert ReportS5 The After Show
Stick around for the after-the-show show, which is Monday night's episode.
The Colbert ReportS5 Code Word - Empathy
Clearly, Obama plans to appoint a drug-addled evolutionist with swine flu to the Supreme Court.
The Colbert ReportS5 The Prescott Group Bailout
Help your old friends at the Prescott Group because if they go down, they're taking you with them.
The Colbert ReportS5 J.J. Abrams
J.J. Abrams reveals clues to Stephen's Persian Gulf mystery before Romulan Stephen demands revenge.
The Colbert ReportS5 Sign Off - Colbert Nation Home
Every great American's interactive adventure starts with colbertnation.com.
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