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The Colbert Report
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The Colbert Report
Russell Simmons
Season 3 • 04/23/2007
Russell Simmons officially invites Stephen to the next Hip Hop Summit.
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00:33
Hyperbole-Off
The Colbert Report
S3
Stephen may have lost the Meta-Free-Phor-All to Sean Penn, but he will not lose his upcoming Hyperbole-Off to George Clooney.
04/19/2007
02:34
God's Pet Chimp
The Colbert Report
S3
Human DNA has stopped evolving because God got us right the first time when he intelligently designed us.
04/19/2007
08:27
Meta-Free-Phor-All: Shall I Nail Thee to a Summer's Day?
The Colbert Report
S3
Stephen has a metaphor for Sean Penn: Sean Penn is a big mean jerk, and Stephen hates him.
04/19/2007
02:59
The Word - $400 Haircut
The Colbert Report
S3
Sure, John Edwards grew up poor, but if he really cared about the poor, he would have stayed poor.
04/19/2007
02:08
Stephanie's Winning!
The Colbert Report
S3
Stephen's adopted turtle, Stephanie Colbertle, is leading the Great Turtle Race, while two other lady turtles hang back at the nesting grounds, listening to Melissa Etheridge.
04/23/2007
00:42
Gonzales Forgot
The Colbert Report
S3
Alberto Gonzales said 71 times that he couldn't remember details on the U.S. attorney firings, but he only remembers saying it once.
04/23/2007
04:51
ThreatDown - MySpace
The Colbert Report
S3
It's bad enough that MySpace exposes our teens to child predators, now they're corrupting our youth with journalism.
04/23/2007
00:30
Intro - 4/23/07
The Colbert Report
S3
Conservatives want a fresh new face, Sheryl Crow confronts Karl Rove and Def Jam's Russell Simmons sits down with Stephen.
04/23/2007
04:58
Mike Huckabee - Running Mate Bid
The Colbert Report
S3
Mike Huckabee and Stephen talk about plastic fruit and rowing in paddleboats in Central Park.
04/23/2007
00:11
Colbert Nation Online Discussion Group
The Colbert Report
S3
Stephen speaks to those interested in joining a Colbert Nation discussion group.
04/23/2007
05:45
Russell Simmons
The Colbert Report
S3
Russell Simmons talks about Oprah, diamonds and the secret to success.
04/23/2007
03:22
D.C. Voting Rights - Eleanor Holmes Norton
The Colbert Report
S3
Stephen tells Eleanor Holmes Norton that this is the United States of America, not the United Districts of Columbia of America.
04/24/2007
03:18
The Word - Act Globally
The Colbert Report
S3
According to the head of the EPA, George W. Bush is making major progress -- there is a 4/10ths of one percent reduction in the increase of greenhouse gasses.
04/24/2007
02:48
60% Good News
The Colbert Report
S3
When Stephen watches "Fox & Friends," he feels like he's watching a Disney movie about the news.
04/24/2007
06:32
Dr. Andrew Weil
The Colbert Report
S3
Dr. Andrew Weil tells Stephen that it's possible to channel his rage in a useful way and that he finds Dr. House to be too cynical.
04/24/2007
00:55
Bye-Bye to Boris
The Colbert Report
S3
Russia's first democratically elected President, Boris Yeltsin, has passed away and the New York Post has paid tribute with their usual class and sensitivity.
04/24/2007
01:12
Sign Off - Captain Lead
The Colbert Report
S3
Stephen reminisces about his favorite childhood toys: Captain Lead, General Light Socket, Admiral Dry Cleaning Bag, Lieutenant Fluffy -- and his wad of asbestos.
04/24/2007
00:32
Intro - 4/24/07
The Colbert Report
S3
Stephen discusses President Bush's fight against global warming and the two seats being considered for Congress, and sits down with new age medical guru Dr. Andrew Weil.
04/24/2007
01:35
Alpha Dog of the Week - Uncle Ben
The Colbert Report
S3
After 61 years, Uncle Ben is now not only spokesman of his products but CEO of the company.
04/24/2007
01:18
New Issue of GQ
The Colbert Report
S3
Stephen expects the new issue of GQ with him on the cover to be the most popular issue they've ever had.
04/25/2007
04:52
Four Horsemen of the A-Pop-Calypse - Prayer
The Colbert Report
S3
People don't develop special powers, they pray for them. The only reason Superman can fly is because Jesus is carrying him.
04/25/2007
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