The Colbert Report

Mark Kelly

Season 9 • 10/08/2012

Mark Kelly shares his children's book, "Mousetronaut: Based on a (Partially) True Story."

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03:22

The Colbert ReportS9
Mitt's "Etch A Sketch" Behavior

Mitt Romney shakes up his long-term policy promises, but the fact-check mafia warns that it could backfire.
10/04/2012
03:54

The Colbert ReportS9
Mitt's Socialist Rhetoric & Body Language

Though Mitt Romney contradicted everything he said on the campaign trail, Fox News applauds his confident facial expressions during the debate.
10/04/2012
05:26

The Colbert ReportS9
George Church

Molecular geneticist George Church shares his book, "Regenesis: How Synthetic Biology Will Reinvent Nature and Ourselves."
10/04/2012
01:54

The Colbert ReportS9
Chris Matthews's Impotent Rage

MSNBC craps its pants over Barack Obama's debate performance, and Mr. Potato Head Chris Matthews is particularly steamed.
10/04/2012
00:08

The Colbert ReportS9
Sign Off - Rabbit Food

Stephen feeds Mitt Romney's updated tax plan.
10/04/2012
02:39

The Colbert ReportS9
Obama's Debate Apathy & PBS

President Obama acts like he doesn't want to debate, and the Alpha Mitt plans to can Jim Lehrer and Big Bird.
10/04/2012
01:06

The Colbert ReportS9
Sign Off - Welcome Baby Brumm!

Stephen's writer sends a story pitch during his first day with his new daughter.
10/08/2012
03:33

The Colbert ReportS9
Koch Brothers & Orc Senate Candidate

Charles and David Koch pledge $1 million to Arkansas House Republicans, and Maine state Senate candidate Colleen Lachowicz gets slammed for her gaming hobby.
10/08/2012
00:29

The Colbert ReportS9
Intro - 10/8/12

A new minority forms, campaign attacks target personal hobbies, and Mark Kelly plugs his children's book, "Mousetronaut."
10/08/2012
03:41

The Colbert ReportS9
Unemployment Below Eight Percent

The Bureau of Labor Statistics cooks the books for Barack Obama while his government-mooching allies get off the couch and go to work.
10/08/2012
05:36

The Colbert ReportS9
Mark Kelly

Former astronaut Mark Kelly recalls the Endeavour's final mission, Stephen's shuttle landing and the story behind "Mousetronaut."
10/08/2012
00:39

The Colbert ReportS9
Intro - 10/9/12

Russia sets its sights on the North Pole, Mitt Romney sends a warning to Iran, and music legend Morrissey stands up for animals.
10/09/2012
03:34

The Colbert ReportS9
Mitt Romney's Vague, Long-Winded Foreign Threats

Mitt Romney proves he knows what Americans want in international relations: a few extra wars in Syria, Iran, Afghanistan and Libya.
10/09/2012
05:10

The Colbert ReportS9
Morrissey

The former lead singer of "The Smiths" talks about the Queen's Diamond Jubilee, radical vegetarianism and his song "Meat Is Murder."
10/09/2012
03:20

The Colbert ReportS9
President Obama's Obsessiveness Plea

In the face of Mitt Romney starting to run for president, President Obama reveals his desperation during a California fundraiser.
10/09/2012
04:39

The Colbert ReportS9
Smokin' Pole - The Quest for Arctic Riches - China & Russia

Greenland officials see through China's sudden interest in their country, and Russia makes its holy mark on the North Pole.
10/09/2012
04:43

The Colbert ReportS9
ThreatDown - Apple Fan-Bears, Drunk Cars & Bears

Bears choose FaceTime over eating people's faces and discover that Americans are most vulnerable at the mall.
10/10/2012
05:36

The Colbert ReportS9
Naomi Wolf

Naomi Wolf explores low sexual desire among women, vaginal anatomy and America's outdated cultural script on sex.
10/10/2012
00:08

The Colbert ReportS9
Sign Off - "Vagina: A New Biography"

Stephen reads up on female anatomy.
10/10/2012
04:54

The Colbert ReportS9
The Word - Meducation

Since America can't afford all the teachers it would take to give children personal attention, doctors recommend psychostimulants to improve kids' grades.
10/10/2012
04:56

The Colbert ReportS9
Beverage-Based Polling & Pizza Toppings Town Hall

The 7-Eleven coffee cup poll has a margin of error of "Mormons can't drink coffee," and Pizza Hut promises one town hall questioner free pies for life.
10/10/2012
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