The Colbert Report
Kitten Subway Crisis & The New York City Mayoral Race
Season 9 • 09/05/2013
Republican Joe Lhota is the only pro-dead kitten candidate in the NYC mayoral race.
Gary EnglandThe Colbert ReportS9
Meteorologist Gary England locates Tornado Alley on a map and defends residents of Oklahoma.
Cris-Ish in Syri-Eh - Steve CollThe Colbert ReportS9
Pulitzer Prize-winning writer Steve Coll details President Obama's "limited military action" plan for Syria.
Perfect PollyThe Colbert ReportS9
A plastic parakeet brings retirees all the joy of owning a real parakeet -- like chirping, perching and more chirping.
Intro - 9/4/13The Colbert ReportS9
Congress debates taking action in Syria, technology breeds robotic companions, and meteorologist Gary England knows tornados.
Cris-Ish in Syri-EhThe Colbert ReportS9
Only 29% of Americans want the U.S. to attack Syria -- which, on the plus side, means that 29% of Americans know there is a place called Syria.
John PrineThe Colbert ReportS9
Folk legend John Prine recalls his time working as a mailman and explains why he's opposed to twerking.
cOlbert's Book Club & The Couch BunkerThe Colbert ReportS9
Stephen assigns any book by J.D. Salinger except "Catcher in the Rye" and touts the latest product in home protection.
Intro - 9/5/13The Colbert ReportS9
Christine Quinn and Bill de Blasio vie for New York City mayor, gun owners get good news, and acoustic legend John Prine joins Stephen.
Smile File - Ariel Castro & The Eric Bolling Sunshine ExpressThe Colbert ReportS9
Fox News' Eric Bolling recommends that more prisoners should hang themselves like Ariel Castro to save taxpayer dollars.
Kitten Subway Crisis & The New York City Mayoral RaceThe Colbert ReportS9
Mayoral candidate Joe Lhota goes after the key anti-kitten demographic after two lost kittens shut down America's largest transportation system.
Egypt's Stork BustThe Colbert ReportS9
With tensions running high in Egypt, everyone suspects everyone else of espionage, including birds.
Ronald Reagan on the Syrian ConflictThe Colbert ReportS9
Conservatives like Bill O'Reilly have an unconditional ability to know what Super Reagan would do at any given time.
Billie Jean KingThe Colbert ReportS9
Tennis legend Billie Jean King talks about her 1973 "Battle of the Sexes" match against Bobby Riggs.
Tip/Wag - Iowa, Bigger Pants & Recent ArticlesThe Colbert ReportS9
Disability rights activists support gun permits for the blind, bigger pants make Stephen feel thinner, and recent articles ruin the fun in dissected human cadavers.
Syrian Conflict Action PlanThe Colbert ReportS9
Congress knows that the only thing less popular than attacking Syria is Congress, so clearly, Congress must approve an attack on Syria.
Sign Off - Spider ReaganThe Colbert ReportS9
Stephen plays with political action figures.
cOlbert's Book Club - Tobias Wolff & "The Catcher in the Rye"The Colbert ReportS9
"This Boy's Life" author Tobias Wolff explains why he prefers Holden Caulfield to J.D. Salinger's Glass family.
cOlbert's Book Club - J.D. SalingerThe Colbert ReportS9
America chooses not to attack Syria, and Stephen gets ready to discuss the biggest initials in 20th century literature.
cOlbert's Book Club - Shane Salerno on J.D. SalingerThe Colbert ReportS9
"Salinger" author and director Shane Salerno talks about J.D. Salinger's lost love Oona O'Neill and the reason for Seymour Glass' suicide in "A Perfect Day for Bananafish."
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