The Colbert Report
Intro - 11/14/05
Season 1 • 11/14/2005
Tonight, women in Jordan blow up the glass ceiling.
The Colbert ReportS1 The DaColbert Code - Samuel Alito
Stephen uses The DaColbert Code to pierce the veil of secrecy and solve modern-day mysteries.
The Colbert ReportS1 The In-Box - Asian Stereotypes
In an attempt to apologize for accidentally perpetuating an Asian stereotype, Stephen shares some of The Report's airtime with its sister station in Osaka.
The Colbert ReportS1 The Word - Armistice
President Bush is saving Veterans Day by creating thousands of new veterans.
The Colbert ReportS1 Swear to God
Stephen believes that big oil company CEOs should have sworn in before testifying to Congress.
The Colbert ReportS1 Bob Kerrey
Stephen pitches former Senator Bob Kerrey his plan for training the Iraqi army.
The Colbert ReportS1 Internets Anniversary
Stephen buys himself an Internet anniversary present from eBay.
The Colbert ReportS1 The Word - Testosterone
Stephen thinks women are weaker than men for being incapable of completely abandoning their humanity.
The Colbert ReportS1 CMA Buzz
Stephen is giddy with anticipation for the Country music Awards -- not to be confused with the CMT Flame Worthy Awards or the ACM awards.
The Colbert ReportS1 Tip Line - Flag Sticker
Call Stephen if you have a new way to display the flag on your car.
The Colbert ReportS1 Un-American News - Shame Cotton
The Japanese are so ashamed of their prime minister's suicide attempt, they hide their ashamed faces behind shame cotton.
The Colbert ReportS1 Intro - 11/14/05
Terrorist bombings in Jordan may be the first sign that women have blown up the glass ceiling.
The Colbert ReportS1 The Word - The Orient
George W. Bush is going to Asia, and Stephen has some pointers -- not vomiting and not bringing back any pandas are two big ones.
The Colbert ReportS1 Formidable Opponent - Torture
Stephen explains to Stephen the pros of torture: how it can be used, how it should be used and why it's okay to feel dirty about it.
The Colbert ReportS1 Intro - 11/15/05
Stephen reincarnates some Asians, calls up some viewers and talks to Al Sharpton about his plans for the next five elections.
The Colbert ReportS1 Sayako's Wedding
Stephen is pretty wiped-out -- after last night's episode, he flew to Japan to attend the wedding of his friend, Princess Sayako.
The Colbert ReportS1 Fract - Mt. Rushmore
Mt. Rushmore depicts several famous people, and all of them are American.
The Colbert ReportS1 Al Sharpton
Al Sharpton talks about the war in Iraq, racism and the best ways to motivate yourself to lose some weight.
The Colbert ReportS1 Bring 'Em Back or Leave 'Em Dead - Asian History
Thinking over a list of significant players in Asia's history, the only one that doesn't make it is the band, Asia.
The Colbert ReportS1 Intro - 11/16/05
The Senate wants oversight of the Iraq war. What's next -- the Supreme Court interpreting a law?
The Colbert ReportS1 Better Know a District - Colorado's 2nd - Mark Udall
Failing to climb Mt. Everest on three tries doesn't make Representative Mark Udall a quitter -- there's another word for it.
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