The Colbert Report
Fract - Nobody Messes with House
Season 1 • 11/30/2005
You can push around a British doctor.
Better Know a District - California's 50th - Randy "Duke" CunninghamThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen blames California's 50th district for Randy "Duke" Cunningham having to resign over bribery charges.
Richard PrestonThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen wants Richard Preston to scare the pants off of him.
The Word - ConfidenceThe Colbert ReportS1
We have enough confidence to let our government operate without having any confidence in it.
Was It Really That Bad? - Black DeathThe Colbert ReportS1
The Black Death didn't just make more dead people, it also made less competition for those few live people.
Intro - 11/29/05The Colbert ReportS1
On tap: the failed Canadian government, the bubonic plague and Richard Preston -- with any luck, he'll bring an Ebola monkey.
The "Duke's" ThingsThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen looks at everything Randy "Duke" Cunningham must now say goodbye to.
Katrina vanden HeuvelThe Colbert ReportS1
Katrina vanden Heuvel is a proud liberal who is considered mainstream on her stances in ending the war in Iraq and on national health care.
The Word - Gay Gay Gay Gay GayThe Colbert ReportS1
Pope Benedict decrees that men who have not had homosexual encounters for three years have only "transitory" homosexual tendencies and still qualify to be priests.
Intro - 11/30/05The Colbert ReportS1
Stephen discusses Bush's plan for victory in Iraq, learns about America's 10 sexiest union organizers and talks to Congressperson Carolyn Cheeks Kilpatrick.
Around the World in 11.6 Seconds - MediaThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen reports the international news in 11.6 seconds.
Fract - Nobody Messes with HouseThe Colbert ReportS1
The actor who plays "House, M.D." is British, but he plays an American.
The Word - SpectacleThe Colbert ReportS1
The threat of lethal injection is the number one reason Stephen hasn't murdered anyone yet.
Intro - 12/1/05The Colbert ReportS1
In tonight's episode, Stephen weighs the merits of your new face transplant.
Richard ClarkeThe Colbert ReportS1
Former counterterrorism czar Richard Clarke discusses his new book of fiction, "The Scorpion's Gate."
Giant Gold WasherThe Colbert ReportS1
The Winter Olympics are Stephen's favorite time of the every four years.
Face TransplantThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen honors the heroes who toil to plump our sunken cheeks, hoist our drooping buttocks and thread serrated plastic sutures through the fatty layers beneath our necks.
Tip/Wag - SeattleThe Colbert ReportS1
Something crashes in Seattle, and this time it's not Windows 98.
Kennedy Center HonorsThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen doesn't understand why Ted Kennedy gets to decide who the best artists are in this country.
This Week in History - December 4th-10thThe Colbert ReportS1
Prohibition ended when Utah ratified the 21st Amendment -- no surprise considering the booze-drenched land of debauchery Utah has become.
Colbert Nation Citizen AwardThe Colbert ReportS1
Lock your doors and windows, America. There's an escaped criminal on the loose.
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