The Colbert Report

Kennedy Center Honors

Season 1 • 12/05/2005

Stephen isn't a fan of the Kennedy Center Honors.

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04:49

Richard Clarke
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Former counterterrorism czar Richard Clarke discusses his new book of fiction, "The Scorpion's Gate."
12/01/2005
02:15

Giant Gold Washer
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The Winter Olympics are Stephen's favorite time of the every four years.
12/01/2005
01:31

Face Transplant
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Stephen honors the heroes who toil to plump our sunken cheeks, hoist our drooping buttocks and thread serrated plastic sutures through the fatty layers beneath our necks.
12/01/2005
04:04

Tip/Wag - Seattle
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Something crashes in Seattle, and this time it's not Windows 98.
12/01/2005
02:37

This Week in History - December 4th-10th
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Prohibition ended when Utah ratified the 21st Amendment -- no surprise considering the booze-drenched land of debauchery Utah has become.
12/05/2005
01:51

Colbert Nation Citizen Award
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Lock your doors and windows, America. There's an escaped criminal on the loose.
12/05/2005
05:21

Maureen Dowd
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Maureen Dowd proves that when you send a woman to do a man's job, they wind up abolishing men.
12/05/2005
01:50

Apology
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Bobby breaks away from the pack in the horserace of shame.
12/05/2005
03:49

The Word - XMas
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Wishing a non-believer "Merry Christmas" is no different than inviting a foreign exchange student to a Fourth of July barbeque
12/05/2005
00:37

Intro - 12/5/05
The Colbert ReportS1

Tonight, Stephen covers the Kennedy Center awards and asks Maureen Dowd if he's necessary.
12/05/2005
04:03

Kennedy Center Honors
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen doesn't understand why Ted Kennedy gets to decide who the best artists are in this country.
12/05/2005
05:53

Anderson Cooper
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen is getting tired of all the comparisons between himself and Anderson Cooper.
12/06/2005
02:35

The Word - Backsies
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The free ride is over now that corporations are adopting the beloved childhood ritual of backsies.
12/06/2005
00:31

Season of Giving
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen frowns on nameless acts of charity because they're the coward's way out.
12/06/2005
07:00

Better Know a District - Virginia's 8th - Jim Moran
The Colbert ReportS1

There is nothing Stephen can do to get Jim Moran to take a swing at him.
12/06/2005
00:09

Fract - The Star Spangled Banner
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It's a common misconception that Francis Scott Key wrote "The Star Spangled Banner."
12/06/2005
00:38

Intro - 12/6/05
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Stephen Colbert introduces tonight's topics, including Americans dying poor and ABC's new anchors. Plus, Representative Jim Moran and Anderson Cooper stop by.
12/06/2005
00:36

Intro - 12/7/05
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Tonight, Stephen sits down with Congressional Quarterly columnist Craig Crawford and previews the war on Christmas.
12/07/2005
03:14

The Word - Hell, No!
The Colbert ReportS1

Americans aren't willing to just give Hugo Chavez their hearts and minds, but they'll trade them for oil.
12/07/2005
04:46

Burritos Happy Holidays
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Stephen finds a blatant example of anti-Christmas secularism run amok.
12/07/2005
05:33

ThreatDown - Threats
The Colbert ReportS1

Another terrorist attack is "inevitable" now that the 9/11 Commission has told the terrorists it is.
12/07/2005
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