The Colbert Report

Intro - 3/15/07

Season 3 • 03/15/2007

Stephen hopes President Bush doesn't notice that Alberto Gonzales broke his crystal egg.

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00:59

The Colbert ReportS3
Sign Off - United We Lick

Although Stephen can't enjoy his ice cream until Lent ends, his famous friends can.
03/14/2007
04:15

The Colbert ReportS3
When Ancestors Attack - Barack Obama

Remember -- John F. Kennedy's presidential chances were almost spoiled when questions were asked about his heritage
03/14/2007
03:20

The Colbert ReportS3
The Word - High Fidelity

Upset you got fired, U.S. Attorneys? That's what unemployment insurance is for.
03/14/2007
00:34

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 3/14/07

Stephen talks to Ed Viesturs about climbing Mount Everest, and Bush draws increasing criticism for trying to install his own people as U.S. Attorneys.
03/14/2007
01:23

The Colbert ReportS3
Rocky Mountain High

As an avid outdoorsman, Stephen understands that Rocky Mountain High is not about drugs.
03/14/2007
05:39

The Colbert ReportS3
Ed Viesturs

Ed Viesturs agrees to plant a Colbert Report flag on top of Mount Everest the next time he goes.
03/14/2007
06:18

The Colbert ReportS3
Ayaan Hirsi Ali

Stephen asks Ayaan Hirsi Ali if fundamentalist Christians should battle fundamentalist Muslims.
03/15/2007
03:26

The Colbert ReportS3
St. Patrick's Day

St. Patrick's Day can't go on now that geneticists have discovered that the English and the Irish are a single people.
03/15/2007
00:17

The Colbert ReportS3
Sign Off - Candy

Stephen plans out a sweet dreamscape for his loyal audience.
03/15/2007
06:00

The Colbert ReportS3
Better Know a District - Illinois' 17th - Phil Hare

Stephen takes his vitamin E -- a couple of caplets in the mouth keeps the blood flow going south.
03/15/2007
00:34

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 3/15/07

In tonight's episode, Stephen talks to Ayaan Hirsi Ali about fundamentalist Islam, and President Bush returns from his trip to Latin America.
03/15/2007
02:35

The Colbert ReportS3
Emanuel Attacks Stephen

Congressman Rahm Emanuel tells freshman students to avoid Stephen, and Stephen fights back by offering the congressman a severed finger.
03/19/2007
01:22

The Colbert ReportS3
Alpha Dog of the Week - Pennies

After getting charged triple the amount of his normal electric bill, Robert Hancock paid the damage in pennies and is thus named Alpha Dog of the Week.
03/19/2007
01:01

The Colbert ReportS3
Willie Nelson Tomorrow

In anticipation of Willie Nelson's appearance on The Report, Stephen speaks out against Willie Nelson's Country Peach Cobbler ice cream and promotes Americone Dream.
03/19/2007
06:07

The Colbert ReportS3
Jerome Groopman

Dr. Jerome Groopman discusses "How Doctors Think" and explains that Dr. Gregory House is based on Sherlock Holmes, who was addicted to cocaine, not heroine.
03/19/2007
03:03

The Colbert ReportS3
The Word - Pound of Flesh

South Carolina has come up with a program to help control the prisoner population -- inmates can reduce their sentences by donating vital organs.
03/19/2007
04:20

The Colbert ReportS3
ThreatDown - Seniors

Time Magazine, angry dancing seniors, fertility clinics and the FDA are all threatening America.
03/19/2007
00:29

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 3/19/07

Prisoners can donate organs in South Carolina, senior citizens speak out against the war in Iraq, and Stephen speaks with author Jerome Groopman
03/19/2007
02:55

The Colbert ReportS3
Stephen Colbert Day - Honor

In celebration of Stephen Colbert Day, Stephen takes a few moments to honor Oshawa, Ontario, the city that will now give him free parking.
03/20/2007
03:59

The Colbert ReportS3
Willie Recall

Stephen goes after Willie Nelson for his competing ice cream flavor with a vicious ad campaign.
03/20/2007
00:27

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 3/20/07

Scientist do some renovating inside the womb, Stephen gives us a reason to visit Canada, and country musician Willie Nelson stops by.
03/20/2007
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