The Colbert Report

Intro - 12/1/09

Season 5 • 12/01/2009

Recovery.gov is the first non-porn website to use the words "stimulus" and "jobs."

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Watching

00:33

The Colbert ReportS5
Amateur Hour at the White House

Joe Biden crashes President Obama's state dinner to get on "The Real Housewives of Delaware."
11/30/2009
05:39

The Colbert ReportS5
Cevin Soling

Cevin Soling says public schools have been transformed into prisons because of an overdependence on security.
11/30/2009
06:39

The Colbert ReportS5
Something Is Melting in Denmark - Dan Esty

Dan Esty believes President Obama will bring a change in spirit to the United Nations Climate Change Conference.
11/30/2009
06:27

The Colbert ReportS5
Better Know a Lobby - Ploughshares Fund

Joseph Cirincione plays "Sanction, Bomb, Marry?" with Iran, Pakistan and North Korea.
11/30/2009
00:03

The Colbert ReportS5
Sign Off - Goodnight

That's it for the show, everybody.
11/30/2009
06:00

The Colbert ReportS5
Gold, Frankincense and Mars - Guy Consolmagno

Brother Guy Consolmagno explains why the Vatican accepts the possibility of alien life.
12/01/2009
06:09

The Colbert ReportS5
Sherman Alexie

Sherman Alexie criticizes digital technology for taking away the local celebration and appreciation of books.
12/01/2009
04:22

The Colbert ReportS5
Better Know a Made-Up District - Connecticut's 42nd

Connecticut's 42nd District is located in the middle of the River Styx and is represented by Brad Pitt's character from "Fight Club."
12/01/2009
00:04

The Colbert ReportS5
Sign Off - Goodnight

That's it for The Report, everybody.
12/01/2009
02:53

The Colbert ReportS5
U.S. Army Chain of Command

By sending 30,000 more troops to Afghanistan, President Obama must be unfamiliar with the chain of command.
12/01/2009
00:34

The Colbert ReportS5
Intro - 12/1/09

The Catholic Church searches for life on other planets, and Sherman Alexie discusses his book, "War Dances."
12/01/2009
06:39

The Colbert ReportS5
Deployment Figures

President Obama's speech to send 30,000 troops to Afghanistan was missing passion and a certain word.
12/02/2009
06:53

The Colbert ReportS5
Cheating Death - R.J. Reynolds, Genzyme & Bionic Bottom

R.J. Reynolds hopes to make money off of quit-smoking aids, Genzyme pills contain trash, and a man regulates his bowel movements via remote control.
12/02/2009
00:34

The Colbert ReportS5
Intro - 12/2/09

Barack Obama sends 30,000 troops into Afghanistan, and Craig Watkins overturns old convictions with DNA evidence.
12/02/2009
06:11

The Colbert ReportS5
Craig Watkins

Craig Watkins tries to bring back credibility to the criminal justice system by overturning wrongful convictions.
12/02/2009
00:03

The Colbert ReportS5
Sign Off - Goodnight

That's it for the show, everybody.
12/02/2009
00:31

The Colbert ReportS5
Intro - 12/3/09

Tiger Woods says he's sorry, Stephen has Olympic fever, and Janet Napolitano isn't securing the homeland.
12/03/2009
02:34

The Colbert ReportS5
Tiger's Tale

Tiger Woods didn't realize that cheating is a sacred institution between one man, one woman and one other woman.
12/03/2009
05:26

The Colbert ReportS5
Skate Expectations - Skeleton Team Tryouts - Zach Lund

Zach Lund gives Stephen the history of skeleton racing before helping him try out for the Olympic team.
12/03/2009
06:04

The Colbert ReportS5
Janet Napolitano

Janet Napolitano discusses America's border security and explains why she doesn't believe in the color-coded terror alert level.
12/03/2009
00:25

The Colbert ReportS5
Sign Off - Welcome Sean Julien

Stephen welcomes the newest member of the Colbert Nation, Sean Julien.
12/03/2009
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