The Colbert Report

Colbert Galactic Initiative - Bill Clinton Pt. 2

Season 9 • 04/08/2013

Bill Clinton explains his selfish reasons for starting the Clinton Global Initiative.

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07:54

Francis Collins
The Colbert ReportS9

BRAIN Initiative project director Francis Collins discusses the most complicated biological structure in the universe.
04/04/2013
00:07

Sign Off - EEG Cap
The Colbert ReportS9

Stephen monitors his brain activity.
04/04/2013
03:25

Obama's BRAIN Initiative
The Colbert ReportS9

If the gun registry is just a plot to take away America's guns, then Obama's brain registry is just a ploy to take away its brains.
04/04/2013
00:29

Intro - 4/4/13
The Colbert ReportS9

The Obama administration starts a science initiative, and NIH Director Francis Collins tries to map out the brain.
04/04/2013
03:41

Pegasus Pipeline Spill
The Colbert ReportS9

For legal and tax reasons, the black, sticky stuff that surged through an Arkansas suburb isn't classified as oil; it's "diluted bitumen."
04/04/2013
05:06

Koko & Jeremy Irons on Gay Marriage
The Colbert ReportS9

Koko the talking gorilla conveys her sadness, and Jeremy Irons's anti-gay comments aren't offensive because he eventually wishes everybody well.
04/04/2013
07:19

Colbert Galactic Initiative - Bill Clinton Pt. 1
The Colbert ReportS9

President Bill Clinton explains why he doesn't call the Clinton Global Initiative the Clinton American Initiative.
04/08/2013
00:17

Sign Off - Colbert Galactic Initiative
The Colbert ReportS9

Bill Clinton says goodnight and reminds Stephen that he succumbed to the famed Clinton charisma.
04/08/2013
04:19

Colbert Galactic Initiative - Bill Clinton Pt. 3
The Colbert ReportS9

President Bill Clinton advocates political participation, praises social networks and utilizes his new Twitter account, @PrezBillyJeff.
04/08/2013
04:01

Colbert Galactic Initiative
The Colbert ReportS9

Stephen introduces the Colbert Galactic Initiative, salutes Clinton Global Initiative University students, and readies the stage for President Bill Clinton.
04/08/2013
04:47

Colbert Galactic Initiative - Bill Clinton Pt. 2
The Colbert ReportS9

President Bill Clinton discusses his time restraints as president and his "totally selfish" aid work, including agricultural projects in Rwanda and Malawi.
04/08/2013
03:01

Exxon's Disaster Relief
The Colbert ReportS9

Exxon tries to put the Pegasus pipeline oil back underground where it came from and employs a time-honored cleanup technique pioneered by drunk guys.
04/09/2013
06:49

Charlie LeDuff
The Colbert ReportS9

Detroit native Charlie LeDuff discusses white flight, black flight, business flight and "dead flight" in his hometown.
04/09/2013
08:36

Clinton Global Initiative University Exchange Fair
The Colbert ReportS9

Stephen joins Bill and Chelsea Clinton to check out problem-solving projects, like helmet concussion sensors and fecal-powered toilets.
04/09/2013
00:10

Sign Off - Potato Clock
The Colbert ReportS9

Stephen aspires to solve world hunger.
04/09/2013
00:38

Intro - 4/9/13
The Colbert ReportS9

Stephen heads back to the Clinton Global Initiative, the Arkansas pipeline spill persists, and author Charlie LeDuff explains why America shouldn't give up on Detroit.
04/09/2013
01:30

Prez Billy Jeff Clinton
The Colbert ReportS9

President Bill Clinton gains over 88,000 Twitter followers as @PrezBillyJeff.
04/09/2013
04:16

Anthony Weiner's Comeback
The Colbert ReportS9

After withdrawing from public life to spend more time with his penis, ex-congressman Anthony Weiner is ready to stick it back in.
04/10/2013
03:14

Navy Laser Technology
The Colbert ReportS9

America now has a laser canon that can do anything from scorch a fast-attack boat to dazzle the enemy with a nonlethal burst.
04/10/2013
06:47

Shane Smith
The Colbert ReportS9

VICE co-founder Shane Smith discusses his journalism adventures in Taliban-controlled areas, North Korea and labor camps.
04/10/2013
00:07

Sign Off - Laser Tag
The Colbert ReportS9

Stephen blasts America's enemies with dollar lasers.
04/10/2013
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