The Colbert Report

Bicycle Theft

Season 2 • 07/31/2006

That good woman on Fox News was trying to teach our youth how to steal bikes!

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07:17

The Colbert ReportS2
Exclusive - Better Know a District - District of Columbia - Eleanor Holmes Norton

Stephen asks Congresswoman Norton whether it's safe to give her constituents full voting rights.
07/27/2006
05:47

The Colbert ReportS2
Joe Quesada

Marvel Comics editor-in-chief Joe Quesada discusses a new series of comics entitled Civil War, which combines superheroes with today's government.
07/27/2006
07:17

The Colbert ReportS2
Better Know a District - District of Columbia - Eleanor Holmes Norton

Since the District of Columbia is not a state, it is not in the United States.
07/27/2006
03:02

The Colbert ReportS2
Floyd Landis' Balls

Stephen defends Floyd Landis' high level of testosterone with the argument that Americans have huge balls.
07/27/2006
03:24

The Colbert ReportS2
The Word - Secretary-General Bolton

The U.N. should appoint John Bolton to its Secretary-General position and bring the world together by tearing it apart.
07/27/2006
03:21

The Colbert ReportS2
Tip/Wag - Lance Bass

A tip of the hat to Lance Bass: it takes a brave man to admit he's gay and an even braver man to volunteer to be shot into space for being gay.
07/31/2006
04:10

The Colbert ReportS2
The Word - Wikiality

On Wikipedia, we can create a reality that we can all agree on -- the reality we just agreed on.
07/31/2006
02:27

The Colbert ReportS2
Book Club

Stephen and his book club start the meeting with a book burning.
07/31/2006
07:37

The Colbert ReportS2
Ned Lamont

Stephen asks Senate hopeful Ned Lamont if he thinks the president's going to kiss him.
07/31/2006
00:31

The Colbert ReportS2
Intro - 7/31/06

Stephen profiles Wikipedia and the response to Lance Bass coming out of the closet, and thanks Ned Lamont for destroying the Democratic Party.
07/31/2006
01:44

The Colbert ReportS2
Bicycle Theft

Stephen loves local news: there's no getting bogged down in the issues, it's half murder, half news you can use -- no fat.
07/31/2006
00:07

The Colbert ReportS2
Sign Off - Energy

Stephen reminds viewers to save energy.
08/01/2006
02:41

The Colbert ReportS2
The Word - Uncool

Rather than trying to come up with a smoking vaccine, scientists should concentrate on real problems, like lung cancer.
08/01/2006
05:28

The Colbert ReportS2
Peter Beinart

Peter Beinart stops by to talk about his book, "The Good Fight," and why he changed his mind about the war.
08/01/2006
03:08

The Colbert ReportS2
Cuba Libre

Making connections from Cuba all the way to Kevin Bacon, Stephen reveals his plan for making World War III truly global.
08/01/2006
04:21

The Colbert ReportS2
Balls for Kidz - Carnivals

A brutally honest tutorial on the world of carnivals, covering such topics as rides, food and death.
08/01/2006
00:29

The Colbert ReportS2
Intro - 8/1/06

Stephen reports on smoking vaccines and carnivals. Author Peter Beinart will explain why only liberals can win the war on terror.
08/01/2006
03:10

The Colbert ReportS2
Courting Joe Lieberman

Stephen pulls out all the stops to get Joe Lieberman to appear on his show, but wonders if Lieberman has enough Joementum to do it.
08/01/2006
02:48

The Colbert ReportS2
On Notice - How the On Notice Board Is Made

You can't just throw something on notice at the drop of a hat. Stephen shows a Prescott Educational Film on how something gets to be On Notice.
08/02/2006
06:57

The Colbert ReportS2
Linda Hirshman

No matter what Linda Hirshman says, men can't stay home and raise children -- daytime TV is all geared towards women.
08/02/2006
00:12

The Colbert ReportS2
Sign Off - Cocoa Puffs

Hey General Mills, where the hell is Stephen's case of Cocoa Puffs?
08/02/2006
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