The Colbert Report
The Most Poetic F@#king Thing I've Ever Heard
Season 3 • 02/01/2007
A moth that drinks the tears of a magpie is the most poetic thing Stephen has ever heard.
The Colbert ReportS3 Jed Babbin
Stephen asks Jed Babbin what can be done to shut the American people up.
The Colbert ReportS3 Intro - 1/31/07
Stephen looks at gay sheep, and throws down with Gregory Meeks.
The Colbert ReportS3 Better Know a District - New York's 6th - Gregory Meeks
Stephen asks Gregory Meeks if he expects much resistance to the mandatory gay marriage act.
The Colbert ReportS3 On Notice - Jane Fonda Fantasies
Stephen can't put Jane Fonda on notice until he puts his fantasies of Jane Fonda on notice.
The Colbert ReportS3 Chuck Schumer
Chuck Schumer talks to Stephen about his new book, his views on Iraq and Hillary Clinton. Then, Stephen accuses him of promising a bad economy.
The Colbert ReportS3 The Word - We Shall Overcome
The Hispanic Congressional Congress is a perfect example of being colorblind -- they have eleven non-Hispanic members to their five Hispanic members.
The Colbert ReportS3 Cartoon Terrorism
A publicity stunt for Aqua Teen Hunger Force caused a terrorism scare in Boston. What's more, it also ruined several marketing campaigns that Stephen had planned.
The Colbert ReportS3 Intro - 2/1/07
Tom Tancredo has plans to get rid of the congressional black caucus, Stephen's getting sick from the Oscars and Chuck Schumer has advice for the Democrats.
The Colbert ReportS3 Ending Racism
In response to a remark by Frank Hargrove, Stephen apologizes for racism and bids farewell to it with a video montage.
The Colbert ReportS3 Movies That Are Destroying America - Oscars Edition
The Oscars really made Stephen sick this year with movies like "Little Miss Sunshine," "Pan's Labyrinth" and "An Inconvenient Truth."
The Colbert ReportS3 The Most Poetic F@#king Thing I've Ever Heard
Rainbow covered bridges paved with babies' dreams has nothing on moths that drink the tears of sleeping magpies. That's the most poetic f**king thing Stephen has ever heard.
The Colbert ReportS3 Peyton Manseed
Stephen is thrilled about the Bears being slaughtered in the Super Bowl and approves of Prince's kosher halftime performance.
The Colbert ReportS3 Intro - 2/5/07
Despite global warming, Stephen's freezing his ass off while that bastard Tesla gains another victory, and Wendy Kopp gets schooled by America.
The Colbert ReportS3 Wendy Kopp
Stephen's speaks with Teach for America founder Wendy Kopp and suggests that eliminating schools entirely is the best way to achieve equal educational opportunity.
The Colbert ReportS3 The Word - Second Opinion
Stephen is all for the second opinion. If a doctor says he's allergic to shrimp, he finds a doctor that says he's not. He feels the same about scientists and global warming.
The Colbert ReportS3 ThreatDown - Giant Mexican Babies
Banning light bulbs, giant Mexicans babies crossing the border, the Miss America pageant and the misrepresentation of bear hugs are all major threats.
The Colbert ReportS3 Save Stephen Jr.
Stephen discovers that Stephen Jr. has made it back into the U.S. but fears that Congressman Brian Baird might kill him.
The Colbert ReportS3 Intro - 2/6/07
The Pentagon may be doing business with Iran, and Congressman Zack Space can be heard screaming. Plus, Stephen finds out why Charles LeDuff doesn't do Internet dating.
The Colbert ReportS3 Charles LeDuff
Journalist Charlie LeDuff talks about "US Guys" and tells Stephen that the manliest men in America are in Oklahoma's gay rodeo.
The Colbert ReportS3 Better Know a District - Ohio's 18th - Zack Space
Stephen takes a look at Ohio's 18th and speaks with Congressman Zack Space, who has some pretty radical views -- for a Democrat.
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