The Colbert Report
Workers' Comp Temptation
Season 5 • 04/09/2009
Stephen fights the temptation to sever his limbs with a paper cutter.
The Colbert ReportS5 Birkat Hachama - Stephen Frees His Jews
Birkat Hachama marks the time for Stephen to free his Jews.
The Colbert ReportS5 Electronic Edition
Far too many of you still get the show delivered on paper.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 4/8/09
An update on Stephen's trip to the Persian Gulf, and Phil Bronstein discusses the death of newspapers.
The Colbert ReportS5 Phil Bronstein
Stephen asks Phil Bronstein if the death of newspapers and journalistic oversight will begin a golden age of corruption.
The Colbert ReportS5 Where and When Is Stephen Going to the Persian Gulf? - Bahrain
The military asked Stephen to adopt a "don't ask, don't tell" policy for his trip, which is hard because he's Dubai-curious.
The Colbert ReportS5 Alpha Dog of the Week - Ted Stevens
Ted Stevens seeks justice for others, as long as those others are him.
The Colbert ReportS5 The Enemy Within - Hedgehogs
Hedgehogs were illegal in Kansas until one obsessed 10-year-old played the cute card.
The Colbert ReportS5 Stephen's Severed Head
Stephen earns 2,634 weeks of workers' comp for severing his head.
The Colbert ReportS5 Bart Ehrman
Stephen discusses Bart Ehrman's theory that the Bible contradicts itself.
The Colbert ReportS5 ThreatDown - Robert Gates, Dog Seders & Obama
Robert Gates chops our defense budget, dogs get their own Seders, and Obama bows before the Saudi king.
The Colbert ReportS5 Workers' Comp Temptation
The New York Times' worker's compensation chart for severed limbs continues to tempt Stephen.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 4/14/09
The government tries to regulate small loans, and Susie Orbach wants us to rethink our body image.
The Colbert ReportS5 Susie Orbach
If Susie Orbach drops five pounds, she could be talking about her book "Bodies" on The Daily Show.
The Colbert ReportS5 Space Module: Colbert - Sunita Williams
However far the space station goes, Stephen's treadmill will always have gone a few miles more.
The Colbert ReportS5 The Word - Have Your Cake And Eat It, Too
The Payday Loan Reform Act drags the payday loan industry out of the darkness and into the anemic firefly flicker of nominal oversight.
The Colbert ReportS5 Clarence Thomas' New Job
Justice Clarence Thomas appreciates the little things in life, like the miracle of dishwashers.
The Colbert ReportS5 Better Know a District - Illinois' 18th - Aaron Schock
Stephen may have chemistry with Congressman Aaron Schock, but he's keeping it professional.
The Colbert ReportS5 Obama Denies Habeas Corpus
Barack Obama helps America escape from the Bill of Rights lovers who keep humping the leg of habeas corpus.
The Colbert ReportS5 Homework Assignment
Stephen wants a summary of the show with special emphasis on theme and literary devices on his desk tomorrow morning.
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