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The Colbert Report
ThreatDown - Gay Divorce
Season 5 • 02/09/2009
God meant for divorce to be between a man and a woman.
More
Watching
00:13
The Colbert Report
S5
Keep Your Friends Close
You can keep your enemies closer by hating yourself.
02/05/2009
00:31
The Colbert Report
S5
Intro - 2/5/09
What's in the stimulus package? Stephen's guessing high-fructose corn syrup because that stuff is in everything.
02/05/2009
02:40
The Colbert Report
S5
Stelephant Colbert the Elephant Seal
Stephen has a hideous elephant seal named after him.
02/05/2009
02:03
The Colbert Report
S5
Alpha Dog of the Week - Boy Scouts of America
The Boy Scouts of America proudly raise the Scout sign and tell their own conservation code to read between the lines.
02/05/2009
07:03
The Colbert Report
S5
Jonah Lehrer
Jonah Lehrer talks about finding a balance between the rational and the emotional in decision-making.
02/05/2009
02:39
The Colbert Report
S5
Economic Stimulus Bill - James Surowiecki
James Surowiecki says the Democrats are using the financial crisis to push through programs that are in the long-term interest of Americans.
02/05/2009
04:38
The Colbert Report
S5
Economic Stimulus Debate
Democrats take a page from the Republicans' fear book when selling the economic stimulus bill.
02/05/2009
00:30
The Colbert Report
S5
Intro - 2/9/09
A married lesbian couple files for divorce and moves into separate Subaru Outbacks, and someone won a Grammy.
02/09/2009
02:43
The Colbert Report
S5
The New Word Czar
Michael Steele navigates the subtleties of our language as he talks about the stimulus bill.
02/09/2009
04:01
The Colbert Report
S5
Al Gore Steals Stephen's Grammy
Since Stephen's voice isn't worth a Grammy, he's going to stop talking forever.
02/09/2009
05:45
The Colbert Report
S5
ThreatDown - Gay Divorce
A lesbian couple files for divorce on the grounds of irreconcilable sameness, and the Japanese poop gold.
02/09/2009
06:02
The Colbert Report
S5
Shout Out - Honey, Counterterrorism & an Old Guard Flag
Stephen gets a fresh stash of pharmaceutical-grade hive jive and learns of a Counterterrorism Calendar.
02/10/2009
01:55
The Colbert Report
S5
The Visa Black Card
Visa: it's everywhere you want to be, unless that place is a Jimmy Buffett concert.
02/10/2009
05:12
The Colbert Report
S5
The Word - Loyal Opposition
The best way for Republicans to win back the trust of the people is to copy the strategy of our enemies.
02/10/2009
00:14
The Colbert Report
S5
You Look Like Stephen
You look like Stephen, if he were on a curvy, glassy thing.
02/10/2009
00:31
The Colbert Report
S5
Intro - 2/10/09
Tough times for the Republican Party -- this sounds like a job for tax cuts.
02/10/2009
05:42
The Colbert Report
S5
Robert Ballard
Robert Ballard explains why ocean exploration is a good investment.
02/10/2009
05:33
The Colbert Report
S5
Truth From the Gut
Forget looking into each other's eyes for the truth, we need to look into each other's guts.
02/11/2009
00:13
The Colbert Report
S5
Good Night -- Except for the West Coast
That's it for The Report, unless you are watching on the West Coast.
02/11/2009
00:31
The Colbert Report
S5
Intro - 2/11/09
Wshington, D.C. wants a vote, and Glenn Beck brings innovation to Fox News.
02/11/2009
02:02
The Colbert Report
S5
Westminster Dog Show Snub - Formula 40-Woof
Pick up some Formula 40-Woof today if you want your dog to be a winner.
02/11/2009
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South Park
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Cartman's major fight with his mom isn't the only conflict threatening the town's very existence in South Park: The Streaming Wars, available June 1 only on Paramount+.
05/25/2022
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Hot Mess Holiday
Diwali Gets Wild in Hot Mess Holiday
Melanie Chandra and Surina Jindal embark on a zany weekend adventure during Diwali in the Comedy Central original movie Hot Mess Holiday, now streaming.
12/20/2021
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A Clüsterfünke Christmas
A Clüsterfünke Christmas Is TV's Holiday-est Movie
Featuring a hunky lumberjack, a quaint family business and more, everybody's favorite holiday tropes come together in Comedy Central's festive TV-movie parody, A Clüsterfünke Christmas.
12/17/2021
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00:30
Every Episode of Seinfeld Is Now on Comedy Central
Every moment, every character and every yada, yada, yada of Seinfeld is now on Comedy Central.
11/10/2021