The Colbert Report

Colbert and Colmes - Colmes Gets Fired

Season 5 • 01/05/2009

Stephen fires Alan Colmes.

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03:22

Rod Blagojevich's Birthday
The Colbert ReportS4

Governor, you really shouldn't have told anyone about last year's birthday wish to get away with your crimes.
12/10/2008
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03:49

The Ghost of Stage Manager Bobby
The Colbert ReportS4

The ghost of Bobby returns to show Stephen what his life was like before he became a greedy, narcissistic shell of a man.
12/11/2008
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00:37

Intro - 12/11/08
The Colbert ReportS4

Atheists are trying to take the Christ out of Christmas. What's next, taking the Christ out of Christiane Amanpour?
12/11/2008
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00:38

Stephen Eats Ghost Ribs
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen wishes everybody a Merry Christmas, especially his former stage manager Bobby.
12/11/2008
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07:09

Michael Phelps
The Colbert ReportS4

Michael Phelps will compete in the 2010 Winter Olympics after Stephen teaches him how to ice dance.
12/11/2008
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07:22

The Word - The Unbearable Lightness of Supreme Being
The Colbert ReportS4

Christmas really burns atheists up, which they can think of as a preview of their afterlife.
12/11/2008
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06:29

Colbert and Colmes - Roland Burris Appointment
The Colbert ReportS5

Rod Blagojevich proves himself to be a civil rights leader.
01/05/2009
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04:37

John King
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen congratulates John King and the rest of the media on getting Obama elected.
01/05/2009
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05:12

Tek Jansen - Beginning's First Dawn: Episode Three
The Colbert ReportS5

Tek Jansen attempts to free some innocent, delicious beings from slavery.
01/05/2009
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00:27

Intro - 1/5/09
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen is still feeling the effects of his New Year's celebration.
01/05/2009
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02:52

Colbert and Colmes - Colmes Gets Fired
The Colbert ReportS5

Alan Colmes can't come back to the show unless he has a book to promote.
01/05/2009
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00:25

Thank You, Stephen
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen wants to thank all the people who make this show possible.
01/06/2009
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03:28

Ponzi Schemes
The Colbert ReportS5

Bernard Madoff lost less money than AIG and he throws way better parties.
01/06/2009
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03:59

Hiding Gold - David Leonhardt
The Colbert ReportS5

David Leonhardt endorses Stephen's new business of hiding gold.
01/06/2009
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05:09

Matt Miller
The Colbert ReportS5

Matt Miller says the government must make sure we have basic securities like health care and pensions.
01/06/2009
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06:59

Better Know a District - Utah's 3rd - Jason Chaffetz
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen beats Jason Chaffetz in leg wrestling.
01/06/2009
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00:36

Intro - 1/7/09
The Colbert ReportS5

Obama wants to make it easier for people to sue their employers for past abuse. Jon Stewart, Stephen's silence about your workouts ends.
01/07/2009
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06:10

Benicio Del Toro
The Colbert ReportS5

Benicio Del Toro talks about meeting Castro to prepare for "Che."
01/07/2009
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05:32

The Word - Statute of Liberty
The Colbert ReportS5

If Barack Obama wants people to get the justice they were denied in the past, he should get someone to deny their civil rights now.
01/07/2009
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02:49

Dr. Gupta's Penis Pyramid
The Colbert ReportS5

If Sanjay Gupta gets appointed as surgeon general he'll change the food pyramid.
01/07/2009
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03:24

Tip/Wag - Cocaine Honey
The Colbert ReportS5

Now we know that the missing honeybees are in the bathroom doing a bump.
01/07/2009
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