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The Colbert Report
Al Arabiya Kidnaps Obama
Season 5 • 01/27/2009
Muslim extremists kidnap President Obama.
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Watching
05:21
Ed Young
The Colbert Report
S5
Pastor Ed Young believes more sex will help marriages.
01/26/2009
04:40
Obama's New Science Policy - Chris Mooney
The Colbert Report
S5
Chris Mooney thinks scientists are going to be much closer to Barack Obama than they were to George W. Bush.
01/26/2009
00:30
Intro - 1/26/09
The Colbert Report
S5
An executive order shuts down our secret prisons. Now where will we get our secret license plates?
01/26/2009
05:12
Stephen's Secret Prison
The Colbert Report
S5
Stephen is forced to release Omar after his secret prison is shut down.
01/26/2009
00:23
1-877-SEAN-930
The Colbert Report
S5
Call 1-877-SEAN-930 if you were offended by anything you heard on tonight's program.
01/26/2009
03:12
Bill O'Reilly Doesn't Report Rumors
The Colbert Report
S5
Bill O'Reilly will not report on rumors of Caroline Kennedy having an affair.
01/27/2009
00:31
Intro - 1/27/09
The Colbert Report
S5
President Obama appears on Arab TV and it's not "CSI: Abu Dhabi."
01/27/2009
02:16
Omar Returns
The Colbert Report
S5
If you love something, set it free from the secret prison under your desk.
01/27/2009
05:17
Cheating Death - Lung Health
The Colbert Report
S5
If air with fewer particles will extend your life for five months, logically air with no particles should extend it indefinitely.
01/27/2009
06:21
Philippe Petit
The Colbert Report
S5
Philippe Petit isn't courageous -- he's following his passion.
01/27/2009
02:31
Al Arabiya Kidnaps Obama
The Colbert Report
S5
President Obama is held hostage by a terrorist group calling themselves the Al Arabiya television network.
01/27/2009
00:22
Call 1-877-SEAN-930
The Colbert Report
S5
If you're offended by Holocaust deniers call 1-877-SEAN-930.
01/28/2009
00:34
Intro - 1/28/09
The Colbert Report
S5
The House passes the $800 billion stimulus plan. China, could we interest you in a slightly used Oregon?
01/28/2009
05:57
Denis Dutton
The Colbert Report
S5
Denis Dutton says art is a tool for propagating.
01/28/2009
05:51
Countdown to Atomic Disaster - The Wing-Ageddon
The Colbert Report
S5
Watching the Super Bowl without a plate of chicken wings is like making love without a plate of chicken wings.
01/28/2009
00:06
Goodnight Illinois Gov. Patrick Quinn
The Colbert Report
S5
Stephen says goodnight to Illinois Governor Patrick Quinn.
01/29/2009
00:37
Intro - 1/29/09
The Colbert Report
S5
All 177 House Republicans say no to Obama's stimulus package. Shh! Don't tell them they don't control the House anymore.
01/29/2009
07:07
Sport Report - Chicken Wing Spokesman Richard Lobb
The Colbert Report
S5
Richard Lobb has advice for the man who has to choose between frying chicken wings and educating his kids.
01/29/2009
05:37
John Podesta
The Colbert Report
S5
John Podesta believes that in the last nine days Barack Obama has shown he can make progress.
01/29/2009
01:21
Rod Blagojevich Is Impeached
The Colbert Report
S5
Rod Blagojevich is impeached even after appearing on all the talk shows.
01/29/2009
05:24
The Word - The Audacity of Nope
The Colbert Report
S5
If Republicans can't have a perfect bill to stimulate the economy, they'd rather have no economy at all.
01/29/2009
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Sing along to silly songs and classic symphonies from the show on South Park The 25th Anniversary Concert, premiering August 13 at 10/9c.
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