The Colbert Report

Goodnight Salute

Season 5 • 04/16/2009

Goodnight.

More

Watching

description unavailable
01:53

Obama Denies Habeas Corpus
The Colbert ReportS5

Barack Obama helps America escape from the Bill of Rights lovers who keep humping the leg of habeas corpus.
04/15/2009
description unavailable
00:26

Homework Assignment
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen wants a summary of the show with special emphasis on theme and literary devices on his desk tomorrow morning.
04/15/2009
description unavailable
03:40

Tax Atax
The Colbert ReportS5

Glenn Beck holds his tea party in the only location that makes sense: the Alamo.
04/15/2009
description unavailable
00:34

Intro - 4/15/09
The Colbert ReportS5

It's tax day, or as many Americans call it, "Oh my God, it's 11:30."
04/15/2009
description unavailable
06:29

Jim Lehrer
The Colbert ReportS5

It takes real courage for Jim Lehrer to be boring five nights a week on television.
04/15/2009
description unavailable
00:29

Intro - 4/16/09
The Colbert ReportS5

Gay marriage threatens New York. On the plus side, Stephen will finally be able to marry himself.
04/16/2009
description unavailable
05:06

Indian Elections - Kanishk Tharoor
The Colbert ReportS5

Kanishk Tharoor describes India's beautifully choreographed dance of democracy.
04/16/2009
description unavailable
06:11

The Colbert Coalition's Anti-Gay Marriage Ad
The Colbert ReportS5

There's a giant gay storm gathering, and before long the winds will be blowing each other.
04/16/2009
description unavailable
06:01

Douglas Kmiec
The Colbert ReportS5

Douglas Kmiec doesn't want the state to adopt any religion's perspective and impose it on Americans.
04/16/2009
description unavailable
02:11

Teabagging Protests
The Colbert ReportS5

Perverts sully the patriotic act of a taxpayer rising up, standing over his government and delivering his opinion into the mouth of power.
04/16/2009
description unavailable
00:03

Goodnight Salute
The Colbert ReportS5

Goodnight, everybody.
04/16/2009
description unavailable
07:00

Joe Arpaio
The Colbert ReportS5

Sheriff Joe Arpaio denies that he focuses too much on illegal immigration.
04/20/2009
description unavailable
02:52

Maersk Alabama - Ken Quinn
The Colbert ReportS5

Second Mate Ken Quinn and Stephen are returning to sea to hunt pirates in a two-man paddleboat.
04/20/2009
description unavailable
00:16

Stephen's Only Regrets
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen's only regret is all the great stuff that was cut out because the audience wouldn't stop cheering.
04/20/2009
description unavailable
03:17

Anger's Aweigh
The Colbert ReportS5

Granting vigilantes the right to shoot pirates on the high seas is the free market at its best.
04/20/2009
description unavailable
03:51

Tip/Wag - Texas Secession & MACA
The Colbert ReportS5

Texas Governor Rick Perry wants to secede, and MACA urges the Obamas to use pesticides in their organic garden.
04/20/2009
description unavailable
00:34

Intro - 4/20/09
The Colbert ReportS5

How to deal with the scourge of piracy -- if only there were a form of transportation besides boats.
04/20/2009
description unavailable
01:56

Castro Death Wish List
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen wants to force feed Castro hot dogs and make him watch "This Week with George Stephanopoulos."
04/20/2009
description unavailable
06:32

The Word - Stressed Position
The Colbert ReportS5

Americans will get justice for torture without making any of the good guys pay the price.
04/21/2009
description unavailable
03:12

George Will's Demon Denim
The Colbert ReportS5

George Will launches a righteous attack against Satan's denim leg tubes.
04/21/2009
description unavailable
03:44

Who's Riding My Coattails Now? - Blown Away by the USA
The Colbert ReportS5

Act now and receive Stephen's patriotic CD collection: "Blown Away by the USA," "Stunned by the States" and "Flabbergasted by the Flag."
04/21/2009
You may also like5 Videos
description unavailable
Trailer
01:00

Fires and Full Moons Breed a New Terror on Wolf Pack

A California wildfire awakens a werewolf, but a group of curious teens -- once bitten -- will not shy away from the threat of decimation on Wolf Pack, streaming January 26 on Paramount+.
10/12/2022
description unavailable
Trailer
01:41

This Game of M.A.S.H. Is a Real Monster in Cursed Friends
Cursed Friends

Four pals must break an evil spell and change their fates when a classic kid's game to predict the future comes back to haunt them in the Comedy Central original movie Cursed Friends.
10/10/2022
description unavailable
Trailer
01:22

Out of Office Explores Remote Work Absurdity
Out of Office

A young woman experiences the bizarre extremes of working from home in the film Out of Office, starring Milana Vayntrub, Ken Jeong, Jay Pharoah, Cheri Oteri, Jason Alexander and more.
09/19/2022
description unavailable
Trailer
00:35

A Front Row Seat to South Park The 25th Anniversary Concert
South ParkS25

Sing along to silly songs and classic symphonies from the show on South Park The 25th Anniversary Concert, premiering August 13 at 10/9c.
07/27/2022
description unavailable
Trailer
00:29

Diwali Gets Wild in Hot Mess Holiday
Hot Mess Holiday

Melanie Chandra and Surina Jindal embark on a zany weekend adventure during Diwali in the Comedy Central original movie Hot Mess Holiday, now streaming.
12/20/2021