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The Colbert Report
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The Colbert Report
Goodnight Salute
Season 5 • 04/16/2009
Goodnight.
More
Watching
01:53
The Colbert Report
S5
Obama Denies Habeas Corpus
Barack Obama helps America escape from the Bill of Rights lovers who keep humping the leg of habeas corpus.
04/15/2009
00:26
The Colbert Report
S5
Homework Assignment
Stephen wants a summary of the show with special emphasis on theme and literary devices on his desk tomorrow morning.
04/15/2009
03:40
The Colbert Report
S5
Tax Atax
Glenn Beck holds his tea party in the only location that makes sense: the Alamo.
04/15/2009
00:34
The Colbert Report
S5
Intro - 4/15/09
It's tax day, or as many Americans call it, "Oh my God, it's 11:30."
04/15/2009
06:29
The Colbert Report
S5
Jim Lehrer
It takes real courage for Jim Lehrer to be boring five nights a week on television.
04/15/2009
00:29
The Colbert Report
S5
Intro - 4/16/09
Gay marriage threatens New York. On the plus side, Stephen will finally be able to marry himself.
04/16/2009
05:06
The Colbert Report
S5
Indian Elections - Kanishk Tharoor
Kanishk Tharoor describes India's beautifully choreographed dance of democracy.
04/16/2009
06:11
The Colbert Report
S5
The Colbert Coalition's Anti-Gay Marriage Ad
There's a giant gay storm gathering, and before long the winds will be blowing each other.
04/16/2009
06:01
The Colbert Report
S5
Douglas Kmiec
Douglas Kmiec doesn't want the state to adopt any religion's perspective and impose it on Americans.
04/16/2009
02:11
The Colbert Report
S5
Teabagging Protests
Perverts sully the patriotic act of a taxpayer rising up, standing over his government and delivering his opinion into the mouth of power.
04/16/2009
00:03
The Colbert Report
S5
Goodnight Salute
Goodnight, everybody.
04/16/2009
07:00
The Colbert Report
S5
Joe Arpaio
Sheriff Joe Arpaio denies that he focuses too much on illegal immigration.
04/20/2009
02:52
The Colbert Report
S5
Maersk Alabama - Ken Quinn
Second Mate Ken Quinn and Stephen are returning to sea to hunt pirates in a two-man paddleboat.
04/20/2009
00:16
The Colbert Report
S5
Stephen's Only Regrets
Stephen's only regret is all the great stuff that was cut out because the audience wouldn't stop cheering.
04/20/2009
03:17
The Colbert Report
S5
Anger's Aweigh
Granting vigilantes the right to shoot pirates on the high seas is the free market at its best.
04/20/2009
03:51
The Colbert Report
S5
Tip/Wag - Texas Secession & MACA
Texas Governor Rick Perry wants to secede, and MACA urges the Obamas to use pesticides in their organic garden.
04/20/2009
00:34
The Colbert Report
S5
Intro - 4/20/09
How to deal with the scourge of piracy -- if only there were a form of transportation besides boats.
04/20/2009
01:56
The Colbert Report
S5
Castro Death Wish List
Stephen wants to force feed Castro hot dogs and make him watch "This Week with George Stephanopoulos."
04/20/2009
06:32
The Colbert Report
S5
The Word - Stressed Position
Americans will get justice for torture without making any of the good guys pay the price.
04/21/2009
03:12
The Colbert Report
S5
George Will's Demon Denim
George Will launches a righteous attack against Satan's denim leg tubes.
04/21/2009
03:44
The Colbert Report
S5
Who's Riding My Coattails Now? - Blown Away by the USA
Act now and receive Stephen's patriotic CD collection: "Blown Away by the USA," "Stunned by the States" and "Flabbergasted by the Flag."
04/21/2009
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