The Colbert Report
Season 5 • 04/15/2009
Stephen reads Jim Lehrer's first sex scene from "Oh, Johnny."
The Colbert ReportS5 Susie Orbach
If Susie Orbach drops five pounds, she could be talking about her book "Bodies" on The Daily Show.
The Colbert ReportS5 Space Module: Colbert - Sunita Williams
However far the space station goes, Stephen's treadmill will always have gone a few miles more.
The Colbert ReportS5 The Word - Have Your Cake And Eat It, Too
The Payday Loan Reform Act drags the payday loan industry out of the darkness and into the anemic firefly flicker of nominal oversight.
The Colbert ReportS5 Clarence Thomas' New Job
Justice Clarence Thomas appreciates the little things in life, like the miracle of dishwashers.
The Colbert ReportS5 Better Know a District - Illinois' 18th - Aaron Schock
Stephen may have chemistry with Congressman Aaron Schock, but he's keeping it professional.
The Colbert ReportS5 Obama Denies Habeas Corpus
Barack Obama helps America escape from the Bill of Rights lovers who keep humping the leg of habeas corpus.
The Colbert ReportS5 Homework Assignment
Stephen wants a summary of the show with special emphasis on theme and literary devices on his desk tomorrow morning.
The Colbert ReportS5 Tax Atax
Glenn Beck holds his tea party in the only location that makes sense: the Alamo.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 4/15/09
It's tax day, or as many Americans call it, "Oh my God, it's 11:30."
The Colbert ReportS5 Jim Lehrer
It takes real courage for Jim Lehrer to be boring five nights a week on television.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 4/16/09
Gay marriage threatens New York. On the plus side, Stephen will finally be able to marry himself.
The Colbert ReportS5 Indian Elections - Kanishk Tharoor
Kanishk Tharoor describes India's beautifully choreographed dance of democracy.
The Colbert ReportS5 The Colbert Coalition's Anti-Gay Marriage Ad
There's a giant gay storm gathering, and before long the winds will be blowing each other.
The Colbert ReportS5 Douglas Kmiec
Douglas Kmiec doesn't want the state to adopt any religion's perspective and impose it on Americans.
The Colbert ReportS5 Teabagging Protests
Perverts sully the patriotic act of a taxpayer rising up, standing over his government and delivering his opinion into the mouth of power.
The Colbert ReportS5 Joe Arpaio
Sheriff Joe Arpaio denies that he focuses too much on illegal immigration.
The Colbert ReportS5 Maersk Alabama - Ken Quinn
Second Mate Ken Quinn and Stephen are returning to sea to hunt pirates in a two-man paddleboat.
The Colbert ReportS5 Stephen's Only Regrets
Stephen's only regret is all the great stuff that was cut out because the audience wouldn't stop cheering.
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