Comedy Central shows are now on Paramount+
Try Paramount+
Home
Shows
Episodes
The Daily Show with Trevor Noah
South Park
Doing the Most with Phoebe Robinson
Awkwafina is Nora From Queens
Broad City
Drunk History
Key & Peele
ALL SHOWS
Stand-Up
Short Form
Comedy Central Store
The Daily Show Shop
South Park Shop
Apps
TV Schedule
Live TV
The Colbert Report
Menu
Episodes & Videos
About
The Colbert Report
Intro - 3/18/09
Season 5 E 39 • 03/18/2009
Scientists dig up something unexpected, and no, it's not a social life.
Show More
Watching
03:34
The Colbert Report
S5 E38
Shout Out - The Colbert Report Overseas
The Colbert Report is definitely going to visit our troops sometime in the near or distant future -- or past.
03/17/2009
00:32
The Colbert Report
S5 E38
Intro - 3/17/09
How will the wealthy weather the economic crisis? Easy, they have weather-control machines.
03/17/2009
05:04
The Colbert Report
S5 E38
World of Nahlej - Shmeat
PETA funds a scientist developing meat from tissue culture.
03/17/2009
05:51
The Colbert Report
S5 E38
David Grann
David Grann follows the footsteps of an explorer searching for a lost civilization.
03/17/2009
04:20
The Colbert Report
S5 E38
Colbert Aluminum - Cigar Nubs, Faux Poor & Blixseth
Cigars get shorter, the British elite act poor, and Tim Blixseth sells his private island.
03/17/2009
07:10
The Colbert Report
S5 E39
The Word - Keeping Our Heads
Stephen propses that CEOs be stripped naked and locked together in a Thunderdome scenario with screaming taxpayer spectators.
03/18/2009
03:36
The Colbert Report
S5 E39
Tip/Wag - Mississippi, Talk Shows & SyFy
Mississippi ends child selling, talk shows move to Connecticut, and the SciFi Channel changes its name.
03/18/2009
00:11
The Colbert Report
S5 E39
Sam's Club Time
That's it for time until Stephen runs to Sam's Club and picks up some more.
03/18/2009
01:24
The Colbert Report
S5 E39
Predator X Discovery
Jesus buried the bones of Predator X under the ocean 6,000 years ago to test our faith.
03/18/2009
06:50
The Colbert Report
S5 E39
Juan Cole
Juan Cole doesn't advocate a soft approach, but he wants to take the Muslim world's views into account.
03/18/2009
00:31
The Colbert Report
S5 E39
Intro - 3/18/09
Scientists dig up something unexpected, and no, it's not a social life.
03/18/2009
03:17
The Colbert Report
S5 E40
Bill Posey Alligator Rumors
Stephen demands a DNA test to determine whether Congressman Bill Posey is part alligator.
03/19/2009
03:42
The Colbert Report
S5 E40
When Animals Attack Our Morals - Chimps, Lizards & Spiders
A chimp throws rocks at Swedes, male lizards imitate females, and spiders perform miracles.
03/19/2009
00:36
The Colbert Report
S5 E40
Intro - 3/19/09
A new bill would require presidential candidates to produce birth records. Mitt Romney, you can just show your serial number.
03/19/2009
05:45
The Colbert Report
S5 E40
John McCardell
John McCardell believes the current drinking age law drives alcohol consumption out of public view, putting young people at greater risk.
03/19/2009
06:07
The Colbert Report
S5 E40
Conservative Rap Battle - Michael Steele's Response
In accordance with hip-hop's longstanding fairness doctrine, Stephen presents Michael Steele's rap response, remixed on behalf of Michael Steele.
03/19/2009
00:23
The Colbert Report
S5 E40
Space Module: Colbert - Vote Now
Don't forget to vote for NASA's space node to be named after Stephen.
03/19/2009
00:37
The Colbert Report
S5
Exclusive - Stephen's Vetting Process Pt. 1
Stephen says his relationship to his audience is like a father to a child...if the father is very, very needy.
03/24/2009
01:33
The Colbert Report
S5
Exclusive - Stephen's Vetting Process Pt. 2
Stephen has to answer for some things he wrote in "I am America (and So Can You!)."
03/25/2009
06:04
The Colbert Report
S5 E41
Derrick Pitts
Stephen handles Derrick Pitt's replica of Galileo's telescope with special magic gloves.
03/30/2009
03:18
The Colbert Report
S5 E41
Space Module: Colbert - Democracy in Orbit
Representative Chaka Fattah insists that Stephen won the NASA node-naming contest fair and square.
03/30/2009
You may also like
2 Videos
Trailer
00:30
Doing the Most with Phoebe Robinson
S1
Phoebe Robinson Is Doing the Most with Her Famous Friends
Phoebe Robinson steps out of her comfort zone and shares fun experiences with celebrity guests on Doing the Most with Phoebe Robinson, premiering Friday at 11/10c.
04/05/2021
Trailer
00:15
Watch the Emmy-Winning Schitt's Creek from the Beginning
Get to know the Rose family. Watch the hit comedy Schitt's Creek every Friday starting at 8/7c.
10/03/2020